@pattonoswalt Happy birthday! You make my heart swell!

At a club. Me: "You have the exact same haircut as Callista Gingrich!" Young Starlet: "Go fuck yourself!" Me: "But it looks good!"

At Dentist. Hygienist: "Your business is so exciting! But you just never know anything... right?" Me: "Mmrrrrrgffh."

Pat Sajak & Vanna White taped Wheel of Fortune drunk? Finally there's something to explain why that show was so dangerously on the edge.

The fact that only celebrities suffer "exhaustion" is proof that their job is way harder than that of a soldier/teacher/etc. #heroes

IMDb All-Decade Lists: Johnny Depp, ‘Dark Knight,’ ‘Lost’ dlvr.it/17CgQ7

DONNIE DARKO - #2 IMDB! deadline.com/2012/01/imdb-a…

@pattonoswalt watching Downton Abbey after watching American Idol is like listening to Etta James after listening to explosive diarrhea.

@emannyv Hilarious!

Remember: If you vote for Newt Gingrich, you're preventing him from realizing his true potential as an abandoned snowman.

#Sundance: Richard Gere gives the best performance of his career in "Arbitrage" and my congrats go out to Nicholas Jarecki. #arbitrage

@JRichardKelly @njarecki You made a great movie, Nicky. Your peeps back in LA are so proud. #arbitrage

@KiwiLovesYou @njarecki I hear it went great!

What is the quickest and most effective way to learn Adobe Photoshop/After Effects on a Mac?

I see it as a dystopian cyberpunk love story between Craig and Mara, with Richardson as unknowing herald Cupid. #DragonTattoo

That... and the shrug Mara gives in the tattoo parlor. #DragonTattoo

After five viewings, the most essential moment of Fincher's amazing DRAGON love story is a nod between Mara and Richardson in London.

Knee-jerk reactions, stupid hyperbole, unfair expectations, baseless negativity ... these things can destroy a festival film. Be a pro!

Why's everyone freaked out about Wikipedia being shut down? We still have the lyrics to Billy Joel's "We Didn't Start the Fire."

Andrew Sullivan argues that Obama's presidency has been vastly more successful than either the left or right realize: bit.ly/zDy83U