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jpressler

  1. @johngapper ahem I believe what you meant to say is there are two "Ballses." (yes, I'm trying to cover up for being a moron) 3:08 PM Dec 7th from web
  2. On Sept. 11 2001, every member of my generation started staring at a screen and no one has looked away since http://bit.ly/7zybBO 3:06 PM Dec 7th from web
  3. @moorehn my favorite thing about that list so far is that one of the guys is called Andrew Balls. 12:17 PM Dec 7th from web
  4. Epic: Neel Kashkari on stress eating, Hank Paulson's dry heaves, and "a number out of the air" http://bit.ly/75nBav 8:09 PM Dec 6th from web
  5. @felixsalmon damn it I am so busted. But thanks! 3:06 PM Dec 4th from web
  6. If I was friends with John Paulson, I would get to spend tonight cuddling ponies: http://bit.ly/4qD0DO 3:04 PM Dec 4th from web
  7. He wanted to become a great financial success. As a result, he did not mind wearing women's clothing or taking hormones http://bit.ly/8EOPHN 11:51 AM Dec 4th from web
  8. soooo see you guys this weekend? http://bit.ly/709Gl5 12:05 PM Dec 2nd from web
  9. @felixsalmon you're too dewy and young for "king" 1:39 PM Nov 20th from web
  10. @MegELee thank you! 1:36 PM Nov 20th from web
  11. Come on, folks, check out Blake Lively's boobs. http://bit.ly/3SrI2C Beyonce's edging her out. 11:05 AM Nov 18th from web
  12. "Inmates danced for the movie star and shook his hand as he toured the Shimo La Tewa prison." http://bit.ly/1JjMJm 11:03 AM Nov 18th from web
  13. Too Big To Fail and ZOMBIES: http://bit.ly/XVQX4 2:48 PM Nov 11th from web
  14. briefly wondered if it was written in an accent 1:18 PM Nov 10th from web
  15. @felixsalmon re: Bloomberg headlines, I was stumped by "No Fit for Luxury Lifestyle for Tokyo Women Costs Versace, Gucci Customers" 1:17 PM Nov 10th from web
  16. me and my good friend Paul-Money throw down about Cadbury, the influence of Highdeas on the market:http://bit.ly/2XgFfW 1:13 PM Nov 10th from web
  17. RT@BorowitzReport BREAKING: Goldman Sachs Not Doing "God's Work," Says Satan http://tinyurl.com/yk5cwyd 1:06 PM Nov 9th from web
  18. Every journalist who is not too stupid or too full of himself to notice what is going on knows that what he does is morally indefensible. 11:18 AM Nov 4th from web
  19. The folks at Gawker should try transcribing reporters interview tapes some time. It would probably BLOW THEIR MIND. http://bit.ly/1n5Lb1 11:09 AM Nov 4th from web
  20. The wonderful wackjobs who made billions as the economy tanked: http://bit.ly/278mMQ 11:08 AM Nov 3rd from web