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johnpatter

  1. War does not determine who is right – only who is left. about 13 hours ago from web
  2. Having sex is like playing bridge. If you don’t have a good partner, you’d better have a good hand. 2:11 AM Dec 13th from web
  3. en have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection, make him a sandwich. 1:10 AM Dec 12th from API
  4. We never really grow up, we only learn how to act in public. 1:05 AM Dec 11th from API
  5. If I agreed with you we’d both be wrong. 1:02 AM Dec 10th from API
  6. Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak. 1:57 AM Dec 9th from web
  7. heard a catchy tune of a UK ad now cant get the number 0800 00 10 66 out my head. 8:12 PM Dec 8th from web
  8. We live in a society where pizza gets to your house before the police. 1:57 PM Dec 8th from web
  9. Women might be able to fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship. 11:57 AM Dec 7th from API
  10. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list. 9:53 AM Dec 6th from web
  11. Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. “Yes” is the answer. 8:51 AM Dec 5th from web
  12. I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car. 8:47 AM Dec 4th from web
  13. talking to a friend of mine on Skype: "I don't drunk much either" 12:02 PM Dec 3rd from web
  14. Do not argue with an idiot. He will drag you down to his level and beat you with experience. 8:02 AM Dec 3rd from web
  15. Television rots the mind, destroys the imagination, promotes obesity, and encourages commercialism. It is still awesome. 10:59 AM Dec 2nd from API
  16. I asked God for a bike, but I know God doesn’t work that way. So I stole a bike and asked for forgiveness 7:40 AM Dec 2nd from web
  17. Today I discovered "non-toxic" does not mean "safe to drink" 7:57 AM Dec 1st from web
  18. Geek warning: 2000 mockingbirds = 2 kilamockingbirds 6:57 AM Nov 30th from API
  19. RT @pauutolee94: Thinking of my mood changes .. am i crazy? or just im losing control? 7:38 AM Nov 27th from web
  20. I finally discovered what was causing me to cry during intercourse. It was the mace. 4:57 AM Nov 27th from API
  • Name john patterson
  • Location Arizona
  • Bio I am a film script writer from Arizona
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