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joesmithreally

  1. I'm in no rush, but I wanna die to this song. Just gettin' my order in. Regina Spektor, Man Of A Thousand Faces ♫ http://blip.fm/~h5vz5 about 8 hours ago from Blip.fm
  2. Is that praying mantis show on now? The one where they're dressed up in underwear? Victoria someone makes them walk back & forth. PBS? about 9 hours ago from web
  3. They won't serve me at the Genius Bar, but it's alright. Dives suit me better and I can run a tab at the Moron Bar. about 9 hours ago from web
  4. @blackstarz96 My mood selector's on the fritz. I don't know what it has against Fritz, but it's getting ugly for the poor guy. about 9 hours ago from web in reply to blackstarz96
  5. Spewer. Yup. Twitter should have been spewer. You spew. I spewed. She's a funny spewer. Did you see @sween's spew? Did you like my spew? about 10 hours ago from web
  6. Babies are easy to fix. Hug em, snuggle em, fly em around, bounce em up & down. Pretty soon, pains of unmet need are salved. Babies. about 10 hours ago from web
  7. Of course, a guy is gonna avoid them. They're called shrinks. I might consider seeing an enlarge. about 13 hours ago from web
  8. This account is authored by a committee. Don't believe it? Ask my shrink. Just kidding. I don't have a shrink. about 14 hours ago from web
  9. After weeks on the field, the manic finally had to rest and shower. He should've noticed the depressed guy, behind him, with the shiv. about 18 hours ago from web
  10. @prettygirlmason Amen. The only deadline I'm bound to is my expiration date. And, edible or not, I'm gonna try to outlive that one. about 20 hours ago from web in reply to prettygirlmason
  11. Vas Post-Op Update, Day 11: All systems go, going to warp. about 22 hours ago from web
  12. Consult with your doctor to see if you're healthy enough to have sex. Before you boldly mate with her. 8:55 PM Nov 30th from web
  13. I was pubicly educated. 8:40 PM Nov 30th from web
  14. Toothless vampires try harder. 8:36 PM Nov 30th from web
  15. Personal brands. Don't understand. I was born a brand: Generic. 6:42 PM Nov 30th from web
  16. Wife tosses headless Ken doll: "Can we throw him out?" Me: ... 7yo: "Ally can chew on it." Valuation of male in the House of Estrogen. 5:24 PM Nov 30th from web
  17. An asshole is a douchebag repellent. Trust me. I've done the research. If you have a douchbag infestation, call an asshole. 4:41 PM Nov 30th from web
  18. Anyone know what's up w/the blue avatar hats? I don't wanna join, or get kicked from, that club. I merely wanna demean it. 4:09 PM Nov 30th from web
  19. @IsJonas Couldn't tie off a carnation, so I went w/a rose. What's a little cut above the eye? People gave me space today. So. Happy. Heh. 1:50 PM Nov 30th from web in reply to IsJonas
  20. Did that Big-Ass Jesus over Rio bellow out a new commandment one day? "Thou shalt be shaven!" Mysterious ways, Big Dude. 1:44 PM Nov 30th from web