jetpants
- Thanks Virgin America blacklight! Now the entire plane knows the mustard stain did not totally come out of my jeans. Suck it Tide Stick.about 4 hours ago from Tweetie
- Tweeting from 35,000 feet over Des Moines to say precisely dick. You're welcome.about 4 hours ago from Tweetie
- 'Bring out the gimp.'
'But the gimp's sleeping'
'Oh, my bad. Shit. Umm... well...who's down for Yahtzee?'
#1stdraftmovielinesabout 7 hours ago from Birdhouse
- Important Update: Despite flying Virgin America, my level of attractiveness apparently remains static. Requesting explanation, will update.about 8 hours ago from Tweetie
- Off to New York. Don't worry, I will be sure to keep you all updated with the very latest on my flight status and airline food quality.about 8 hours ago from Tweetie
- Yikes, Versus feature on Columbia. Pretty sure Hincapie is doing the Spinal Tap foil-wrapped cucumber trick. Aero cucumber of course. #Tdf6:35 PM Jul 6th from Tweetie
- @allisonweiss Jordan Jessie Go! Trust me, thank me later, etc. iTunes: http://bit.ly/KyXG4 (You should also be a guest someday, just sayin')11:32 AM Jul 6th from Tweetie in reply to allisonweiss
- @corey76 Unfortunately not bad enough to total. Pushed the rear suspension up, bent the contol arm, hatch crunched up. Took it like a champ.1:03 PM Jul 5th from Tweetie in reply to corey76
- @emilymcintire Holy shit. Nice bike.1:21 AM Jul 5th from Tweetie in reply to emilymcintire
- He hit me so hard it spun me 90 degrees and I could see him out the passenger window. So I flipped him off. CHP giving me a ride home. Neat.12:05 AM Jul 5th from Tweetie
- Thought i'd celebrate America's birthday by getting rear-ended by a Volvo on the Bay Bridge. Awesome.11:05 PM Jul 4th from Tweetie
- Apparently I can't quite pull off "If they don't like it, they can grab on deez". At least not in a corporate setting. Whatever.5:48 PM Jul 3rd from Tweetie
- Woman in front of me in line at the post office has two joints placed under her bra strap. Hard core, this is federal property, yo.6:36 PM Jul 1st from Tweetie
- #lyt #mrdraplin, as usual. Glorious match, yo...11:14 AM Jun 26th from Tweetie
- Get me Harvey Lemmings!2:08 AM Jun 13th from Tweetie
- @corey76 Well played, sir. "It's a big cowboy hat. That's funny"...2:08 AM Jun 13th from Tweetie in reply to corey76
- @corey76 Also, I have no idea what your pizza words refer to, so I am assuming you made them up. Mine had taint, Whoopi Goldberg & briefs.11:14 PM Jun 12th from Tweetie in reply to corey76
- @corey76 No Corey76? Clearly Guy Kawasaki would be disappointed in you watering down your brand. This is why I snagged facebook.com/assface.11:11 PM Jun 12th from Tweetie in reply to corey76
- @emilymcintire Wait, the Hotrock Girls is more my speed. Fixied, with an Aerospoke on the back, and a chainstay-mounted brake lever. #steeez4:19 PM Jun 12th from Tweetie in reply to emilymcintire
- @emilymcintire layertennis.com - Design competition. Now, where my fucking Roubaix at? And other bicycle words as well. #cockholster4:15 PM Jun 12th from Tweetie in reply to emilymcintire
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- Name jetpants
- Location San Francisco
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