jesselcairns
- If you don't already have a low opinion of ghetto folk, watching back-to-back episodes of "The Maury Povich Show" will fix that.4:06 PM Nov 2nd from web
- About 10 hours into NaNoWriMo and I have about 3,200 words. Things are going well, but I need to put the pedal to the metal tomorrow.6:03 PM Nov 1st from web
- I'm always very paranoid about people coughing in public every tome I re-read Stephen King's "The Stand." Sure is a lot of potential doom.1:01 PM Oct 31st from txt
- Buckhorn tri-tip for last meal before the quad-extraction of wisdom teeth tomorrow. Nervous. Who wouldn't be? Deep breaths.6:02 PM Oct 29th from txt
- I'd rather write books about supernatural horror than economic horror, even though the latter is obviously much more terrifying.1:21 PM Oct 22nd from txt
- Trying to find help at Walmart is like trying to find hope at Walmart. Good luck, pal.6:14 PM Oct 10th from txt
- You can't wear a collared shirt under a basketball jersey. You just can't. FASHION FAIL.1:05 PM Oct 9th from txt
- Ah, "Dancing With The Stars." I may have lost "Eureka" and "Warehouse 13" to Re-Run Hell, but you're still with me... for ten weeks or so.8:42 PM Sep 23rd from web
- For a good time, go to and prepare to be amazed by the copious amounts of awe-inspiring FAIL FAIL FAIL.10:00 AM Sep 18th from web
- A person can call information, but generally won't. They get exactly what they deserve.11:21 AM Sep 10th from txt
- A woman who is eight months pregnant should never be sporting a whale-tail thong. Never. Under no circumstances. Ever.3:41 PM Sep 3rd from txt
- Being told you'll eat irradiated food in the future is like cracking open a tragicomic fortune cookie. Welcome to my world.8:03 AM Sep 2nd from txt
- One four-way intersection. Three losers holding signs and begging. The old saying is right: there's always room for one more.12:45 PM Aug 31st from txt
- Spotted a Volvo station wagon with licence plate holder adorned with skulls. Some people don't know a lost cause when they see one.2:52 PM Aug 28th from txt
- I made my appointment for oral surgery today. I am either very responsible, or a complete fucking masochist idiot. Jury is still out.10:35 AM Aug 26th from txt
- Ah, the joys of being sent out to serve the public with substandard equipment. Dead in the water in the middle of the road. Sweetness.6:43 AM Aug 24th from txt
- There are times when the ignorance of my fellow Raider fans make me ashamed to be one. Unfortunately, there's a great many of those times.12:57 PM Aug 21st from txt
- Ever notice that people with "white pride" tattoos never have decent clothes or drive a car that is anything other than a piece of shit?12:53 PM Aug 20th from txt
- I'm making an appointment today to have four wisdom teeth extracted. It's like setting up a date with the guillotine well in advance.1:50 PM Aug 18th from txt
- HE: "Excuse me, I don't want to bother you during your break--"
ME: "It's not going to stop you from doing just that, though, will it?"12:21 PM Aug 17th from txt
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- Name Jesse L. Cairns
- Location Sacramento, CA
- Web http://zombiegoat...
- Bio Writer, musician, bus driver. Author of Salvation, The Final Nine & The Phoenix Initiative.
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