jefferyharrell
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Still unemployed. Can't afford to buy groceries. Almost done with my chocolate Easter bunny. Send help.
10:07 AM Oct 17th
from web
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My hand to god, there is a puppy somewhere on this plane.
3:59 PM Oct 11th
from mobile web
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@ and @ are having a public conversation. We've reached the end of the Internet.
3:08 PM Oct 11th
from mobile web
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The teenage girl in line in front of me gives meaning to the phrase "hormones in our milk."
2:32 PM Oct 11th
from mobile web
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DFW, gate C31. Fuck you, I ain't cryin'. I've just got something in both my eyes at once.
2:18 PM Oct 11th
from mobile web
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The braille for "men," as in "men's room," is a pictograph of a semi-erect penis. I swear on my life this is one hundred percent true.
2:30 PM Oct 9th
from web
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Every time I'm on an elevator with other people and I'm the only one getting off on my floor, I feel the urge to apologize.
1:01 PM Oct 9th
from web
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@ You too, old man. Wish we could've made more time.
8:19 PM Oct 7th
from web
in reply to comebackshane
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According to the news, there's a new ring around Saturn and a new ring of stones near Stonehenge. The Illuminati isn't even trying any more.
6:21 AM Oct 7th
from web
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That's Twitter in a nutshell. "Hey, check out this disgusting thing I just ate/coughed up/pooped out/slept with."
6:02 AM Oct 6th
from web
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Thanks to this chest cold, I have a newly intimate relationship with my expectorations.
I named this morning's "Greeny."
5:59 AM Oct 6th
from web
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Archiving this job to a USB drive will, it says, take 40 hours. Not good when we have a session booked tomorrow morning. Hurry, computer!
4:12 PM Oct 5th
from web
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Picking up girls in the flu-remedy aisle. Hey, baby. Wanna boost our immune systems?
7:25 AM Oct 5th
from web
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The entertainment industry is so fucked up right now, I swear I could get "The Vampire's Proctologist" greenlit with a $30 million budget.
7:38 PM Oct 4th
from web
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This guy makes so much mouth noise when he eats, I'm seriously starting to worry about his anatomy. Something ain't right in his skull.
2:30 PM Oct 4th
from web
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Watching football with two guy friends, and trying REALLY hard not to giggle at the phrase "two-tight-end package."
1:57 PM Oct 4th
from web
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@ Amen to that. Got the first batch of gear racked today, moving the Unity and the Xsan tomorrow. My dogs are barkin'.
3:12 PM Oct 3rd
from web
in reply to comebackshane
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I'm having one of those "What the hell am I doing with my life" days.
1:25 PM Oct 3rd
from mobile web
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Linux can metaphorically suck my dick.
And by "metaphorically" I mean "I like a little teeth, so get to work."
7:53 PM Oct 2nd
from web
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Bad: Massive is not working right and we have a client on Monday. Good: I now have cell phone numbers for nearly all Massive employees.
6:36 PM Oct 2nd
from web
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- Name Jeffery Harrell
- Location Mostly my couch, these days
- Bio I am the face of the recession.
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