jcfregnan
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"Hey, I just spent all day at yoga and my Cleveland smells like a Moroccan village."
10:09 PM Nov 8th
from web
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"TV's the best dad there is. TV never came home drunk. TV never forgot me at the zoo. TV never abused and insulted me."
11:11 PM Nov 5th
from web
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"My mother breastfed me till I was six and now no one will ever match up."
2:31 PM Nov 4th
from web
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"When did you find time to eat a diaper that you found on the beach?"
2:37 PM Oct 30th
from web
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"Oh, knock it off, Jerkules."
1:53 PM Oct 17th
from web
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"You gotta be careful. A lotta things fall under sodomy. I wonder if kissing is sodomy..."
2:42 PM Oct 5th
from web
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"I don't want to hurt your feelings, but is it possible that if I hit you I might get a herpes on my hand?"
9:31 PM Sep 28th
from web
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"I once had a glass of cognac that cost $77, so..."
2:39 PM Sep 25th
from web
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"I've always been intrigued by Stockholm Syndrome. Makes me think of my childhood."
8:17 AM Sep 22nd
from web
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"Doctor? Have you seen my long underwear? I'm late for my ice dancing lesson."
12:53 PM Sep 17th
from web
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"He has an unlimited access to dildos and restraints..."
12:57 PM Sep 15th
from web
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"Well, winning Miss Michigan meant a lot to me, but I had to realize that wasn't my destiny."
3:55 PM Sep 14th
from web
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"Now gluttony and exploitation serves eight."
4:00 PM Sep 12th
from web
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"Y'know, I'm precise, I'm connected, an artist. You and me, we never would'a worked. I'm not rapey enough for you."
5:19 PM Sep 9th
from web
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"The whole key is: strong and focused work where the sidewalk ends."
5:18 PM Sep 9th
from web
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"It was like an empathy boner."
10:35 PM Sep 7th
from web
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"He's got the body of a Jonas brother, but the face... more like a Smothers brother."
9:30 PM Sep 3rd
from web
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"He's got a sexy walk about him."
9:21 PM Sep 3rd
from web
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"Alright, tweez it out, dude."
8:54 PM Sep 3rd
from web
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"I've been jerking off so much lately, any day now I'm gonna yank my ass through to the front."
6:52 PM Sep 3rd
from web
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