javabeans
Ran out of milk, so am eating cereal with 'coffee milk' instead. I'm sure NOBODY is surprised.
| javabeans When you read The Onion, then switch to real news, it takes a strange, confusing moment to realize the headlines aren't a joke anymore. |
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| javabeans Why is it that a refund from a returned purchase feels like magical free money? Must... resist urge... to spend. |
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| javabeans Editing a 100-page document written ENTIRELY IN ALL CAPS. Want to kill writer. |
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| javabeans I just fell off my chair. Granted, the 'chair' is really an exercise yoga ball, but still, that was humbling. |
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| javabeans Kashi cereals are pretty good, but I always feel like in a death match against my teeth, they'd win. |
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| javabeans Speaking of which, when I answered that yes, my name is spelled with an 'h,' I didn't think I had to clarify it wasn't SAHRA. |
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| javabeans Is it just me, or is Coffee Bean kinda really sucking more than usual these days? |
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| javabeans Was one arm in before realizing the 'jacket' I was attempting to wear were pants. I must be tired? |
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| javabeans One of the daily deals on Consumerist is a real, honest-to-goodness cowbell (?!?). More cowbell! |
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| javabeans Careless sunscreen application results in abstract grid-like red-and-white patterning on torso and arms. I am (post-)modern work of art? |
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| javabeans Beach is so crowded it looks like the backside of a biore pore strip. Ew. |
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| javabeans Whoever invented drinking before noon is a genius. |
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| javabeans The sashes/cowls on graduation robes look like vaginas. Can i say that? |
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| javabeans If it's this hot in SD, i don't even wanna know how it is in LA |
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| javabeans Geez louise spammers -- no, I am not interested in 'upgrading' my penis! What does that even MEAN? It sounds painful and undesirable. |
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| javabeans Spicy ramen has gotta be the most satisfying food ever. (To make up for lousy health factor?) Homemade kimchee ramen chigae! Yeah, I'm good. |
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| javabeans I am too old for all-nighters. (I am also too old for procrastination, but that doesn't stop me. Touche, self.) |
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| javabeans Don't wanna go to work today. Don't wanna go to work today. If I say it enough times, maybe I won't have to go. Universe owes me some karma. |
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| javabeans Nooooo.... coffee machine is mysteriously malfunctioning! Thank god for backup coffeemakers. (Yes, I have one. Doesn't everyone?) |
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