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jantzie

  1. Sure, they make mittens for feet, they're called socks. Jackass.
  2. What band is this again? Captain Tone Deaf and His Deltones?
  3. You guys think Sarah Palin would sign a family pack of toilet paper rolls? Yada yada yada... finish this joke to your liking here.
  4. Me: "You can tell she's the kind of girl that likes it rough." Him: "How rough?" Me: "Professor Snape rough."
  5. I'm not depressed, I'm just going through the Janeane Garofalo phase all young girls go through.
  6. ARE YOU STARING AT MY ORNAMENTS? http://bit.ly/795bYO
  7. Broadcasting LIVE @stereohambone with @donjeem and @jantzie on @utahfm (@ Utah Free Media Studio in Salt Lake City) http://4sq.com/4r70Wa
  8. Seriously guys, if there are no more stars to follow, how we find the baby Jebus?
  9. Cock-a-doodle-boo-hoo! #thankyoutextism
  10. Florida lost their quidditch match because Tim Tebow got his broomstick snapped off.
  11. So you're not on your way to an ugly holiday sweater party? Whoops, sorry about that.
  12. "Palin don't hurt." - Dalton (Cooler/Republican)
  13. Last Christmas I gave you my heart, but the very next day you exchanged it for a Snuggie.
  14. @dropdeadchris THANK YOU!
  15. Get it? Mistletoe? CAMELTOE? Meh, forget it.
  16. Is that mistletoe or are you just happy to see me?
  17. @SistaRaeRae I'd ride either fellows fixed-gear. Teehee!
  18. Good gravy, how adorable is Jason Sudeikis? Be still my hipster heart! http://gdzl.la/7kjVSJ
  19. Hans Gruber is the reason for the season! (Related: anyone who says that Die Hard isn't the greatest Xmas movie ever is a terrorist.)
  20. I left all my good jokes in my other pants.