hdrubin
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COOL: I think I'm the reincarnation of Albert Einstein. UNCOOL: You can't bring your old brain with you to your new body.
about 3 hours ago
from web
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@ My DVD is sitting by the computer, taunting me to watch it. I've got 7-month-old girls, so it'll probably be in half-hour bits.
5:36 AM Nov 21st
from web
in reply to EricSeidman
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New Moon beats Batman, Harry Potter at box office. Lesson: Never underestimate the spending power of 12-year-old girls.
11:26 AM Nov 20th
from web
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Why are Amy Sedaris and David Sedaris not on here? Do we need a campaign to recruit them to Twitter like Tracy Morgan?
11:00 AM Nov 20th
from web
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I'm going to barricade myself in my cubicle. The authorities will not care or respond. Bosses will probably appreciate it.
10:27 AM Nov 20th
from web
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Dear coffee, headache meds, vitamin, loratidine & various pills: Good morning. Please do your jobs swiftly and efficiently. Thanks, Me.
5:37 AM Nov 20th
from web
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Marriage for us regular folks is a 50-60 year commitment at best. But for vampires and other immortals, let's just say you'd better be SURE.
5:35 AM Nov 20th
from web
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Some Twitterers think they're fortune cookies, spouting wisdom in little teeny sentences. Go ahead, tell me to seize the day one more time.
5:33 AM Nov 20th
from web
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Maria Bamford for Target (in dual roles). @ for eBay. Next up, @ for Always?
9:53 PM Nov 19th
from web
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C'mon, Old Dogs. You have Robin Williams and Seth Green, and you still include a "golf ball to the nuts" joke?
9:21 PM Nov 19th
from web
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Three minutes have passed since any of the 523 people I follow have Tweeted. Either opinions/jokes have dried up, or my computer's dead.
9:16 PM Nov 19th
from web
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Next Tuesday = can't wait, b/c we will no longer hear crap about New Moon. Already disgusted that I know who Bella, Edward and Jacob are.
9:07 PM Nov 19th
from web
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If your name is Elvis, do you have to be famous or extra-talented? Presley, Stojko, Andrus, Costello.
8:56 PM Nov 19th
from web
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Recommended Viewing: Free Radio (after Colbert on Comedy Central).
8:34 PM Nov 19th
from web
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If only I could get paid for washing my infant daughters' hair. It's easily one of the most satisfying things I've ever done.
8:17 PM Nov 19th
from web
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The Pontiac Silverdome sold for under $600,000. Yeesh. I guess every Detroit Lions loss ate away at its resale value.
8:04 PM Nov 19th
from web
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Guy Ritchie puts his serious talent to work for Nike Soccer/Football.
9:23 AM Nov 19th
from web
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Celebreality on VH1 sucked us back in. Sex Rehab with @ and Tough Love are now being DVRd.
9:25 PM Nov 18th
from web
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Some day, I will write the Perfect Tweet. Luminaries like @ @ @ @ will RT. (This is not that tweet.)
9:14 PM Nov 18th
from web
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@ You didn't hear it from me...but @ controls the world from a tastefully decorated palazzo in Burbank.
3:52 PM Nov 18th
from web
in reply to dannychun
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- Name Harley David Rubin
- Location Texas
- Web http://addude13.w...
- Bio I get paid to write. So please send me cash. Also: husband, dad of fraternal twin girls, baseball and pop culture enthusiast.
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