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GPappalardo

  1. I'm caught in a terrible sun storm, I've had to put on shorts and eat ice cream. Pray for me. about 1 hour ago from SocialScope
  2. When you have baby wipes, you never have to shower. about 3 hours ago from SocialScope
  3. I'm going to write a sitcom about 4 people sitting on a couch, posting to Twitter on their phones and all the zany antics that ensue. about 13 hours ago from SocialScope
  4. Does Santa Claus come to your house the week before Christmas and suck on your big toe when you're sleeping, then run out door too? about 13 hours ago from SocialScope
  5. I can't wait to decorate our winter solstice tree tomorrow. about 13 hours ago from SocialScope
  6. Cereal: It's what you eat at midnight. about 13 hours ago from SocialScope
  7. After receiving my gas and light bill today, it appears that the Christmas present to my family was heat last month. about 19 hours ago from SocialScope
  8. I hate nuts in my salad. 11:32 AM Dec 18th from SocialScope
  9. I-'m s-i-t-t-i-n-g o-n t-h-e p-a-t-i-o. 9:45 PM Dec 17th from SocialScope
  10. I was just called "Hell Biscuit" and I think I like it. 9:23 AM Dec 17th from SocialScope
  11. Jennifer Lopez says she doesn't miss the gym, which coincidentally is why her ass doesn't miss the door casing when entering a room. 9:56 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope
  12. You guys are all coming out to California? Hold on, let me light some incense first. 9:38 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope
  13. Hey everyone! My Grandma was nominated for best anal scene at the AVN Awards next year, for her role in "Naughty Nursing Home #12". 9:32 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope
  14. I have a confession to make, my chest hair... implants. 9:25 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope
  15. I wonder if they are going to freeze Roy Disney's body so they can attach Walt's head later and make Frankendisney. 8:47 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope
  16. They should just change that message to "Twitter is getting gang raped by API calls right now, please return later." 8:36 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope
  17. I'm the Twitter account no one wants to tell their parents about. 8:19 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope
  18. "Look, just shut up and suck!" Stupid vacuum. 6:13 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope
  19. Wow, according to Favstar, I now have over 50,000 stars received. Officially making me overrated. 4:23 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope
  20. I'm going to publish a photo coffee table book of me smoking in front of "No Smoking" signs. 2:36 PM Dec 16th from SocialScope