gostandup
-
I saw a video of Oprah putting on makeup..... It didn't look like an application. It looked like an installation.
8:51 AM Oct 2nd
from txt
-
In yet another move, not only was John removed from 'John &Kate plus 8', but Kate was also removed....the show is now called ' 8 '.
7:03 AM Oct 1st
from txt
-
A cannibal just asked me for a cup of joe........ Not sure what he imagines that to be.
10:02 AM Sep 26th
from txt
-
I'm starting 'fantasy women's tennis' . It's easy . Just tune in and watch.
12:21 PM Sep 24th
from txt
-
Paulla Abdul replaced ??...what ?
2:48 PM Sep 10th
from web
-
My wife wants me to get an invisible fence for our dog..... I said, "Let's keep the fence and get an invisible dog.".
8:39 AM Sep 8th
from txt
-
Chris Brown's new book- ' If I did Remember '.
9:52 AM Sep 2nd
from txt
-
I think I have dimentia .............at least that's what my dog told me.
8:42 AM Sep 1st
from txt
-
Tyler Perry is putting one really talented older black actress out of work.... Shame on him!
8:08 AM Aug 29th
from txt
-
The expression , " It won't cost you a fortune." is not very comforting.
8:20 AM Aug 25th
from txt
-
I don't believe in sustained applause. I clap once really loud.
9:23 AM Aug 22nd
from txt
-
Hello fans! I'm at the 50 meter point. As soon as I finish this race, i'll tweet again- sincerely Ussain Bolt
1:24 PM Aug 17th
from txt
-
Camel definition - a horse who is pointing to where the beach is
10:18 AM Aug 15th
from txt
-
I'm listening to Mike Vick's press conference . The first 5 questions were asked by Scooby-Doo, Astro, Snoopy, Clifford , and Lassie.
9:24 AM Aug 14th
from txt
-
I finally deciphered the thousand page Obama Healthcare Reform Plan....... IT'S A COOKBOOK !!!!
11:52 AM Aug 12th
from txt
-
I went to a hockey game and a Town Hall meeting broke out.
12:15 PM Aug 10th
from txt
-
The restroom i'm at says ' Out of Order '.....so i'm going to poop in the sink and wash my hands in the toilet bowl.
10:13 AM Aug 10th
from txt
-
I THOUGHT THE WHITE STUFF WAS OXY- CLEAN!!! - regards Billy Mays
8:06 AM Aug 9th
from txt
-
Dear Sarah Palin, We have a job opening.- sincerely American Idol
12:00 AM Aug 9th
from txt
-
Paula Abdul's chair is now vacant in the fullest sense of the term.
11:55 PM Aug 8th
from txt
|
|