girlvanized
-
Found: Whoever you are, I approve of your grocery list.
about 1 hour ago
from UberTwitter
-
RT @: Fun game while driving: put the word "anal" in front of the names of the models of cars on the road. Awesomest with SUVs.
about 3 hours ago
from UberTwitter
-
He said, "Some people just plain have midget souls." And I can't stop giggling, which probably means I must, too.
about 5 hours ago
from txt
-
@ THERE'S NO CRYING IN OFFICE POLITICS. Actually, wait... Yes. Yes, there is.
about 8 hours ago
from UberTwitter
in reply to Blue_Crab
-
@ At this point, you're just trying to make me hate you. You are succeeding, Mr. Poop Coat. You are succeeding.
about 8 hours ago
from UberTwitter
in reply to fishheadned
-
@ Really, I think we should dress them up like turkeys and sic the Bumpus Hounds on them.
about 9 hours ago
from UberTwitter
in reply to GroverViolet
-
My coworker says she's never seen "A Christmas Story" and isn't interested. I don't think I should be forced to work in these conditions.
about 10 hours ago
from txt
-
For those who worried, the dog will be okay. Spouting more bodily fluids than an angry infant, but okay.
2:01 PM Nov 29th
from UberTwitter
-
Since the only thing missing from this shitty weekend was exorbitant veterinary bills, the dog ate a bunch of silica packets.
9:49 AM Nov 29th
from txt
-
Being a dirty punk doesn't mean you're hardcore; it just means you're too dumb to enjoy hot showers and comfortable footwear.
11:37 PM Nov 28th
from txt
-
Being painfully disappointed by someone just means that they're my friend. Obviously.
9:19 PM Nov 28th
from txt
-
The DJ is playing "Goodbye Horses," and it's making me want to tuck my dick between my legs and dance around in human skin.
7:55 PM Nov 28th
from txt
-
Having dinner at this place called Pu Pu Hot Pot. Cuz I like to giggle while I eat.
6:01 PM Nov 28th
from txt
-
On this gusty autumn day, I hope my food-stealing roommate appreciates the wind chimes I set up outside his bedroom window.
10:12 AM Nov 28th
from UberTwitter
-
I haven't been able to get to sleep all night and I'm just now having my first cocktail. I think I'm doing this wrong.
3:01 AM Nov 28th
from txt
-
I just said "Jesus fucking turd crapping Christ." That pretty much sums it up, huh?
6:46 PM Nov 27th
from txt
-
I'm going to bed at 4AM with massive heartburn. So, I'd say Thanksgiving was a success.
12:54 AM Nov 27th
from txt
-
No Context Theater: "That's when Madonna flipped me the bird."
11:36 PM Nov 26th
from txt
-
There are people dancing to the "Ghostbusters" theme song in the dining room. The party has officially started.
9:43 PM Nov 26th
from txt
-
I'm not drunk, I'm well hydrated.
8:59 PM Nov 26th
from txt
|
- Name Dr. Pickles
- Location Boston, MA
- Bio Dude, I seriously need some strange on my hangdown like whoa.
|