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Dear Congress: All children's toys, remote controls, and vibrators should have to operate on AA batteries. Make it so. Thx.about 5 hours agofrom Tweetie
I just ate a handful of ramen noodles....with my hands. I think maybe it's time to up my meds.about 6 hours agofrom Tweetie
I just ate SPAM. Apparently I have given up completely. I won't buy fat mom-jeans though. I'll just wear these unbuttoned...if at all.about 6 hours agofrom Tweetie
I think the poodle likes his new diaper. I'm like the opposite of the dog whisperer. I take normal dogs & turn the into complete nutjobs.about 6 hours agofrom Tweetie
Omfg! for the love of god child stop moving for two fucking seconds. Nobody takes this long to eat Ramen you squirmy little freak!about 6 hours agofrom Tweetie
Would somebody please do something about Kevin Bacon's hair? It's like a tragic Flo-Bee accidentabout 6 hours agofrom Tweetie
why do I read the comments on Fresno Bee articles? It makes it really hard not to run people down in local parking lots.about 7 hours agofrom Seesmic
Dear @k8cch14, if it's not 2 late, my children wld lk 2 design yr rings out of the crapload of pipe cleaners & beads we got last nite.about 8 hours agofrom Seesmic
