ficklevillain
- @iambryanellis: LOL, you'd better hope mom never finds this thing. be careful cooking crack, you don't want it to boil over. smells heinous.3:12 PM May 26th from web in reply to iambryanellis
- @rainnwilson: you're having lunch with me? wow, you must be lucky. -Dexter Morgan of the San Diego Derby Dolls9:21 AM Apr 1st from TwitterFox in reply to rainnwilson
- @countessmary: holy shit, where did you get such a delicious-sounding sandwich?!9:14 AM Apr 1st from TwitterFox in reply to countessmary
- @countessmary: WHAAAAAAAAAAT?!3:49 PM Mar 30th from TwitterFox in reply to countessmary
- is attempting to find chord charts. is not entirely sure what the fuck she's doing. is really glad her new guitar is so pretty, otherwise...1:56 PM Mar 27th from TwitterFox
- @rainnwilson: odd. i always thought the terms "kickass" and "rebellious" and the word "swirly" were mutually exclusive. oh wait, i still do.9:21 AM Mar 26th from TwitterFox in reply to rainnwilson
- @eddieizzard: almost tweeted "jeezie chreezie" at you...until i remembered that i stole it from you. potentially embarrassing tweet avoided!4:10 PM Mar 25th from web in reply to eddieizzard
- thinks this has the best closing line in the history of the free world...at least, up until this precise moment. (http://tinyurl.com/c3vgtv)8:34 AM Mar 20th from web
- finally got freaking laid! congratulations will be accepted in the form of cash or checks. please make checks payable to Slutty McSatisfied.9:44 AM Mar 18th from TwitterFox
- saw #watchmen twice, fully expecting to develop a crush on the comedian. instead, managed to develop an obsession with nerdy nite owl. love!9:47 AM Mar 9th from TwitterFox
- suddenly finds herself wishing she'd thought to auction off her virginity when she still had the chance. was a far less enterprising virgin.4:50 PM Mar 4th from TwitterFox
- wants to wish everybody a happy Square Root Day! math is sexy! 3x3=9 9x9=81 81x81=6561 6561x6561=43046721 43046721x43046721=185302018885184110:40 AM Mar 3rd from web
- is embarrassed to admit that she deletes her (sent) tweet-replies after a little while because she doesn't like seeing them via her updates.9:39 AM Mar 2nd from web
- is preparing packages to go out. sadly, is the best part of her job. wishes she could just package and organize things all day. is very odd.4:46 PM Feb 18th from TwitterFox
- wishes she had a job that included coworkers, wearing jeans, not covering up her tattoos, and not having to be at work at 8 am. stupid boss.8:27 AM Feb 10th from web
- thinks malt shop cupcakes should taste like chocolate malts, not like spice cookies dunked in self-hatred. too much nutmeg equals angry day.9:44 AM Feb 9th from web
- will bake malt shop cupcakes tonight (while at her mama's for bunco) to give away tomorrow (her 26th birthday). will try not to fuck 'em up.9:45 AM Feb 6th from web
- needs to get laid. has come to the conclusion that all current woes have resulted from lack of fun naked sex time. (makes surprising sense.)4:40 PM Feb 5th from web
- called the at&t lady a "phone ninja" because she was so helpful. was delighted to hear the older woman giggle like a little schoolgirl. rad.2:41 PM Jan 30th from web
- is going to head over and check out this week's postsecrets. will try to remember to keep hot chocolate away from keyboard. is staaarving...9:48 AM Jan 26th from web
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- Name bethany duffy
- Location here-ish
- Bio mentally capable of reading, writing, and arithmetic. chooses to ignore arithmetic.
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