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fandango_1

  1. I wore a suit to jury duty. Whoops! Clearly, I missed the memo about how Appropriate Courtroom Attire means t-shirts, flipflops, and shorts. 9:52 PM Feb 3rd from web
  2. No fakin' I know you see me shakin' the way I break it down I got the whole Earth quakin', off the Richter, off the Richter, off the Richter 8:15 PM Dec 26th, 2008 from web
  3. See the girl with the diamond ring? She knows how to shake that thing. All right, now, now, now. Hey, hey. Hey, hey, all right. 11:23 PM Jun 4th, 2008 from web
  4. Twitter refuses to uphold its own TOS: http://tinyurl.com/6964wv 3:49 PM May 22nd, 2008 from web
  5. Don't tell me that I'm crazy. Don't tell me I'm nowhere. Take it from me. It's hip to be square. Hip, hip. So hip to be square. 3:48 PM May 19th, 2008 from web
  6. When I order a latte and I'm asked for my name, I say, "Elvis". Then when I pick up my drink, I say "Thankyew, ah thankyew vehry much." 10:52 PM May 8th, 2008 from web
  7. I will follow you, Paulo! I will follow you, and help maintain your Twitter equilibrium! 10:24 PM Apr 29th, 2008 from web
  8. You know you've had a long night when you're working late and you know it's really late and then you hear the garbage truck backing up. 6:05 AM Apr 29th, 2008 from web
  9. I wonder if that sidewalk saxophone player in the Financial District knows any other tunes besides the theme to, "The Godfather." 6:40 PM Apr 17th, 2008 from web
  10. "Big Brother" and "Meerkat Manor" are identical shows--they're just voyeur videos about cute creatures that you'd never want in your home. 12:03 AM Apr 10th, 2008 from web
  11. Twiki, the robot on Buck Rogers In The 25th Century, was the love child of C-3PO and R2-D2. 12:10 PM Apr 2nd, 2008 from web
  12. Morning epiphany: Special K is just Rice Krispies for adults. Sudden realization: you're only as young as your last bowl of cold cereal. 2:09 PM Mar 14th, 2008 from web
  13. In "Gimme Shelter", after Merry Clayton's voice cracks on the third refrain of "murder", you can hear Mick Jagger shout an approving "Whoo!" 1:32 PM Feb 25th, 2008 from web
  14. Did you know the stripper on the cover of Tom Waits' "Small Change" album is Cassandra Peterson, aka Elvira, Mistress Of The Dark? I didn't. 5:16 PM Feb 13th, 2008 from web
  15. 新年快乐, y'all! 12:58 PM Feb 4th, 2008 from web
  16. I'm so glad that I know more than I knew then. 9:25 AM Jan 17th, 2008 from web
  17. I was driving to my meeting, singing along to Donna Summer's "Hot Stuff", when I turned and saw my clients in the next lane waving at me. 8:13 PM Dec 21st, 2007 from web
  18. I bet you didn't know Don Ho wrote and sung the lyrics to the "Hawaii Five-O" theme song. 9:49 PM Nov 30th, 2007 from web
  19. "Mele Kalikimaka" is the thing to say on a bright Hawaiian Christmas Day 12:41 PM Oct 19th, 2007 from web
  20. I'll be the ink on your season ticket card 11:05 PM Oct 12th, 2007 from web