ericthekrug
-
@ Well you're sure as shit not talkin' about our dicks!
12:41 PM May 28th
via web
in reply to BlakeWexler
-
@ No, even worse -- France (Am I right??!!)
12:40 PM May 28th
via web
in reply to oldmanweldon
-
@ @ Did the Thunder beat the Lakers while I was gone?? America just got a little more welcoming.
4:55 AM May 28th
via web
in reply to oldmanweldon
-
"Guys, I just came up with the perfect name for my boner... Surge Veinsbourg" - Hugo
5:23 AM May 22nd
via web
-
I've been sneaking in to all the yacht parties pretending to be a billionaire named Billy Nair. No one's caught on.
4:07 AM May 20th
via web
-
@ @ Didn't catch the name, but I'd love it if Bobby D had actually named it Joe Pesci.
4:17 PM May 19th
via web
in reply to metronyc
-
Does that answer your question you poor pieces of shit?!?!
3:50 AM May 19th
via web
-
What's it like at the Cannes Film Festival? Well, I'm watching the A-Team in French & I met Robert DeNiro's dog last night (not joking).
3:49 AM May 19th
via web
-
Kind of surprises me that VP Joe Biden speaking out in support for gay marriage made more headlines than VP Dick Cheney saying it.
12:17 PM May 9th
via web
-
Tonight at The Velv with Lucas Molandes & friends! Monday night at the Rattle Inn with a bunch of other comics! (not friends)
4:23 PM May 5th
via web
-
Dropped my phone in the toilet. Luckily its broken cuz I dont want to know if I’m a guy who’d keep a urine-covered phone just to save money.
10:35 AM Apr 30th
via web
-
“Ain’t you mutha fuckers ever played Tetris before?!” – me upset with how my roommates loaded the dishwasher.
8:42 AM Apr 26th
via web
-
@ workin for tips on 6th!
9:36 PM Apr 22nd
via cinemagram on iOS
-
@ See - the video looks fine. Now the question is, why wasn't I showered with pussy?!?
10:08 PM Apr 22nd
via web
in reply to kmwengler
-
There's a lesbian sitting across from me at the airport wearing a t-shirt that says "I Enjoy Vagina" ... Talk amongst yourselves.
3:50 AM Apr 22nd
via txt
-
Damnit.. I came *this close* to making it out of Portland without diarrhea.
1:00 PM Apr 16th
via web
-
"Action Jackson" features cameo appearances from 3 cast members of Predator & 4 from Die Hard, yet did not get 1 Oscar nomination (???)
1:33 PM Apr 9th
via web
-
Yo, bitches be lovin' Murder She Wrote.
12:07 PM Apr 9th
via txt
-
I know I drank too much when I wake up saying, "Bro -- did I download 'The Last Temptation Of Christ' last night??"
9:20 AM Apr 2nd
via web
-
The only thing more depressing than seeing fat Skylar on Breaking Bad is seeing fat Betty Draper on Mad Men.
7:30 PM Apr 1st
via txt
|
|