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ekessdotcom

Mitt Romney's #Amercia mistake is just his way of telling us he's picking Ben Quayle as his running mate #SonOfPotatoe about 7 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
@pulmyears 'fraid not. about 7 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone in reply to pulmyears
@pulmyears Florida doesn't deserve 3 teams. about 7 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone in reply to pulmyears
Mitt Romney's app misspelling was just clever cross-promotion for the Scripps National Spelling Bee tomorrow at 8am EST on ESPN. Watch it. about 10 hours ago via web
@Crobama Desperation is an awesome part of our culture. about 10 hours ago via web in reply to Crobama
Dear Cable TV, there's so many Pawn Shop stories that need to be told. I'm holding out for Interracial Pawn and MILF Pawn. about 10 hours ago via web
I support a program to equip schizophrenics with Bluetooth headsets. about 12 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
What are the odds we can convince Mexican drug cartels to switch to manufacturing deliciously addictive guacamole? about 12 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
Someone tell doctors who go on talk shows that they don't have to wear lab coats. If you use the abbreviation MD with your name, we get it. about 16 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
@kkjordan you test drove a Toyota? about 16 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone in reply to kkjordan
Pitching a show to @FoodNetwork where iPhone dependent celebrities learn how to make their favorite dishes, called "Siri-ously Cooking." about 20 hours ago via web
An inordinate amount of homeless people in Los Angeles look like Ogre from Revenge of the Nerds. about 20 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
I heard Wikipedia went public today, but then again I read that on Wikipedia. about 21 hours ago via Twitter for iPhone
JohnnyJAirplane There's a sale at Penney's! 12:15 AM May 29th via web Retweeted by ekessdotcom and 5 others
I just deleted the SuDoku app from my iPhone, thus greatly improving my chances of one day winning the Oscar for Best Original Screenplay. 11:48 PM May 28th via Twitter for iPhone
@Cecconi140 Right, it'll take place on the board of directors of a major corporation, and you'll have to guess who the poor guy is. 11:08 PM May 28th via web in reply to Cecconi140
Look for me on an upcoming episode of "Secret Millionaire"- if that show's still on the air in 30 years or so. 11:01 PM May 28th via web
EveryTweet_Ever Congratulations! Instead retweeting your great tweet to potentially tens of thousands of followers, here's a useless trophy! 6:36 PM May 28th via Twitter for iPhone Retweeted by ekessdotcom and 5 others
I threw the winning touchdown pass in the Super Bowl of Dreams; what did you ever do? 6:25 PM May 28th via web
RockabillyJay Nothing important ever happens on an iPhone with a rhinestone covered case. 5:04 PM May 28th via Twitter for Android Retweeted by ekessdotcom and 7 others

Name Evan Kessler
Location California?
Web http://nationalla...
Bio Author of Raisins are Good for You: A Child's Guide to Eating A Raisin-Only Diet. http://evankessler.tumblr.com http://favstar.fm/users/ekessdotcom