eirikur
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I just slipped in a puddle of liquified pigeon. Not pigeon poop. Actual pigeon turned liquid (how, I don't care) Gotta burn these shoes now.
7:27 PM Nov 11th
from Tweetie
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@ it's like an STD. You have to rub up against the right people to catch the tweet.
7:22 AM Nov 11th
from web
in reply to ScottRockit
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Yoga + Vicodin = Bliss
1:22 PM Nov 8th
from web
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I bleed grenadine. Amazing.
3:05 PM Nov 6th
from web
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Further, is this how God sees me? Also, now I know why birds shit on me.
1:24 PM Nov 2nd
from Tweetie
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I mean other than seeing that same reflection in a wall mirror.
1:23 PM Nov 2nd
from Tweetie
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Nothing quite like seeing your reflection in a mirrored ceiling to make you feel really fat and odd shaped.
1:22 PM Nov 2nd
from Tweetie
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Wow, sure are a lot of men dressed as DILFs in Cole Valley.
5:50 PM Oct 31st
from Tweetie
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Overheard: "I don't know guy, urine probably never should be tea colored."
1:03 PM Oct 30th
from Tweetie
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Pilates has angered my core. It's pissed!
8:52 AM Oct 28th
from web
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I've watched 2.0 hours of Sherri on Lifetime. I'm being punished.
9:36 PM Oct 27th
from Tweetie
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Overheard in the Castro: I loved Facebook on the day Kylie was in town.
9:51 PM Oct 24th
from Tweetie
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When I see belts in the thrift stores I wonder how many have killed previous owners during auto-erotic asphyxiation.
3:44 PM Oct 21st
from web
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I love the sound effects on Scrabble for the iPhone so much I'll play a word for lower pts just to hear the trill of the triple letter score
11:44 AM Oct 21st
from web
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I have read the word "Kafkaesque" in 5 separate articles this morning. I am officially banning the use of this word for 1 year.
8:30 AM Oct 21st
from Tweetie
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Do you know who invented chocolate covered pretzels? Bet it was Satan.
1:41 PM Oct 20th
from Tweetie
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This morning I smell like fresh baked oatmeal cookies. I'm afraid to walk by a senior center because grannies will want to eat me.
6:06 AM Oct 19th
from Tweetie
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Outside a BevMo, waiting for it to open on a Sunday, makes me feel like a drunk. There are 10 others waiting to get in. Only 5 are wasted.
9:53 AM Oct 18th
from Tweetie
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Going to suburbia to shop the big box stores. If I don't check back in consider the worst: I've been converted to the suburban lifestyle.
8:25 AM Oct 18th
from Tweetie
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Unplanned click through to gay Emo porn site. Synapses misfiring. Can't formulate coping mechanism response joke. Only want to cut myself.
10:28 AM Oct 16th
from web
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- Name eirikur
- Location SF, CA
- Web http://overheardi...
- Bio Finding the comedic lining in every tragedy cloud since 1977.
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