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Going to eat at the Old Angler's Inn tomorrow with the in-laws because @tallcynic totally bailed on earth. I'm still in denial *lalalala*about 9 hours agofrom UberTwitter
Apparently 1/2 a box of Cocoa Krispies + 1 pot of coffee = heart palpitations. Oops.8:45 PM Nov 24thfrom UberTwitter
Fuck me gently with a chainsaw, I just made coffee and we're out of sugar. Daughter's too young to drive...legally...hmmm2:31 PM Nov 24thfrom UberTwitter
Either I just saw a Mr. T World of Warcraft commercial or my food was spiked with absinthe. I'm hoping it was the latter.7:25 PM Nov 23rdfrom UberTwitter
There is a significant difference between acting immature and being immature.7:11 PM Nov 21stfrom UberTwitter
My BFF @Ironjen is running the Philly 26.2 marathon tomorrow! Fourish years ago she had trouble walking a flight of stairs, she's a miracle!5:52 PM Nov 21stfrom UberTwitter
I don't know who is on these women's "health" advisory boards but I would really love to straight up kick them in the nuts.5:21 AM Nov 20thfrom UberTwitter