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- Oh. The story of my avatar? Sure. An issue of V Life magazine (don't ask) fell into the toilet and I took a picture of it.about 1 hour ago from web
- Kids today just don't know the value of a dollar. Due, in large part, to wildly erratic economic conditions.about 18 hours ago from web
- We Are All Dicks in a Box Now - unimaginative headline from recent edition of fictional local newspaperabout 20 hours ago from UberTwitter
- Is it a good idea to pretend to be using the Socratic method when you really just don't know the answer? Exactly.10:07 AM Jul 5th from UberTwitter
- My dad's male dog "pisses like a bitch." I am told this is both a precise usage of terminology and, in this county, a grave personal insult.9:32 AM Jul 5th from UberTwitter
- Driving north there's a spot, Tobie's, with an amazing array of donuts-filled with jelly, custard, chocolate! Never use the bathrooms there.7:41 AM Jul 4th from UberTwitter
- There's no such thing as "indisputable." Right?6:56 AM Jul 4th from UberTwitter
- If you need me, I'll be reading Tuesdays with Morrie.3:24 PM Jul 3rd from UberTwitter
- I don't use outrageous amounts of artificial sweetener because I have a sweet tooth. I'm trying to kill off the lab rats living in my body.11:03 AM Jul 3rd from web
- Perineal favorite. I'm done.7:27 AM Jul 3rd from web
- With a tiny shift in pronunciation, perineal & perennial become homophones. Try interchanging them in your mind/professional correspondence!7:21 AM Jul 3rd from web
- If I somehow don't make it through this weekend, I ask that my ashes be packed into a firework shell and fired directly at the Boston Pops.7:09 AM Jul 3rd from web
- An alestrom – It's not just a fucking sniglet, it's also a turbulent whirlpool of beer that deliciously threatens to overwhelm you.6:27 PM Jul 2nd from web
- After this plate of lasagne, I'm going to need a Lamaze class.3:30 PM Jul 2nd from UberTwitter
- To the other bescruffed 30something dude with chiseled good looks and a brand-new Mac working in this coffee shop: Fuck you for having hair.6:55 AM Jul 2nd from web
- Don't make me corect myself again.6:41 AM Jul 2nd from web
- I have a shibboleth for judging the level of pretentiousness in twitter users. It's the use of weird-sounding words.6:25 AM Jul 2nd from web
- I reek of gin and self-awareness.8:11 PM Jul 1st from web
- My emotional eating is getting bad. I just destroyed a huge bag of M&Ms in a state of wry amusement. Oh, and self-loathing. Of course. haha3:52 PM Jul 1st from UberTwitter
- Wanted to use the phrase "ex post facto" in a tweet, but I don't know what it means. Will look it up right after sending this.2:35 PM Jul 1st from web
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- Name J.D.
- Location St. Paul
- Web http://www.thelis...
- Bio Think of what you see here as amuse bouches to a meal that will never be served.
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