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ebrion

  1. @westvillagedyke In the past I've had many dogs, cats and ferrets, but now I have an asthmatic spouse who can be killed by dander instead.
  2. @westvillagedyke Done!
  3. @westvillagedyke Awwww!
  4. @westvillagedyke Great Danes are the best dogs ever - so lovely and empathetic. And drooly!
  5. @Scottclevenger I liked that part too, but read it as, "Thanks, porn. Wife sorry. Stop real penis. Actually, wait!"
  6. The TweetCloud Awards, which I just made up! Highest placement of "Shatner" goes to @worldocrap! Congratulations, and thanks from all of us.
  7. @worldocrap Followers should understand you're trapped in your home by a parade and possibly becoming desperate.
  8. Hey! Discount Daisies! A Christmas miracle... : 'Pushing Daisies: The Complete Second Season' http://bit.ly/7W3jI2
  9. I just generated my #TweetCloud out of a year of my tweets. Top three words: time, people, actually - http://w33.us/1nkw
  10. @DrAlice I thought it might be!
  11. I think that entire adorable child is photoshopped in. http://bit.ly/2PCI6G
  12. @parenthetical But where was it? We must know!
  13. It's not really Christmastime until Wilson Pickett sings Jingle Bells! http://bit.ly/8ufbRk
  14. Excited about my first venture into the art of black bottom pie. What are most pies missing, after all? Candy bar in the middle!
  15. @andreakremer In my experience, the men somehow think that's a kindness. My extensive experience.
  16. ...the flat foot floogie with the floy, floy... bass solo!
  17. This @AdamLambert song is kicking up my serotonin levels. http://bit.ly/4OVWYR A cornerstone of health care reform?
  18. Oh, like you wouldn't have given him one.
  19. 11pm. Small, sleepy, incoherent boy staggers into living room, pulls it together just enough to demand: "Where are the cookies?"
  20. @annemack Congratulations on the baby part!