dysolution
- The 14 ft. ceiling is great until you see something crawling across it. You win this one, spider, but one day soon I'll have a ladder.about 4 hours ago from web
- The power of spice compels you.6:33 AM Jul 3rd from web
- @Balut I got a # the other day, and it was confusing and immensely painful. I hope it doesn't start trending.6:03 AM Jul 3rd from web in reply to Balut
- When they start leaking fluid, you can get them fixed, or just get a new one.
Cars: 1
Babies: 010:27 PM Jul 2nd from web
- As the Great Spirit intended, my people are careful to use every part of the clown.12:56 PM Jul 2nd from web
- Downstairs neighbor left a DVD on the title menu looping its loud soundtrack. After 10 more minutes of this I'm unscrewing their fuse.11:34 PM Jun 30th from web
- When Ayn Rand tweets, it's called Anthem.11:07 PM Jun 30th from web
- I like my coffee like I like my women: bitter, overpriced, and ice cold.10:54 PM Jun 30th from web
- Teacher: Use "incongruous" in a sentence.
Student: Incongruous a whole shitload of maize.10:37 PM Jun 30th from web
- Pay it forward with the little things like holding the elevator open or putting your coins in the cashier's tip jar. Or a reach-around.7:12 AM Jun 30th from web
- Yogi Bear doesn't look all that flexible to me.10:36 PM Jun 29th from web
- @SmartyFiles For $250 I'll sell you my last NewAge SewAge enema kit. It aligns your chi and shit. Made from shaman-blessed elf tears.5:12 PM Jun 29th from web in reply to SmartyFiles
- @crackbarbie You and me both, sister.10:11 PM Jun 28th from web in reply to crackbarbie
- @TonyWalla Run.10:06 PM Jun 28th from web in reply to TonyWalla
- @SmartyFiles Those peach pits did 4 tours in Nam before you were born, missy. Respect your elderberries.10:05 PM Jun 28th from DestroyTwitter in reply to SmartyFiles
- @joesmithreally Great. Now that you've set expectations, watch me turn into Carrot Top. (thanks for the endorsement!)9:28 PM Jun 28th from DestroyTwitter in reply to joesmithreally
- I love being kept awake by the neighbors' backyard fireworks. They remind me of my childhood in Kabul.9:01 PM Jun 28th from web
- @joesmithreally Hide inside a copy of "On the Origin of Species." He'll never open it.8:49 PM Jun 28th from web in reply to joesmithreally
- Sure, you all laughed at me when I wore the helmet on the airplane. Who's laughing now?10:13 AM Jun 28th from web
- "CALL NOW! (offer excludes God and God-like deities)"10:10 AM Jun 28th from web
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- Name Jordan Peterson
- Location Madison, WI
- Web http://favrd.text...
- Bio Actor, singer, network technician, frotteur.
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