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donni

  1. I wonder what Gumby is doing right now. Probably getting his fuck on.
  2. Maybe she's born with it. Maybe she's a hermaphrodite.
  3. Guys named Seymour no longer exist.
  4. Running low on pie. Better sound the pie siren.
  5. How do we know the dinosaurs weren't drunk the whole time?
  6. If you can't handle me at my worst, we probably can't hang out cuz that's me at all times.
  7. My left hand doesn't know what my right hand is doing, or vice versa. Hands are dumb.
  8. Reality, chill. I'll deal with you later.
  9. Pants should have to wear pants so they understand why it sucks to wear pants.
  10. "Let the shits fall where they may." -Birds
  11. With great Powerball comes great Responsibilityball.
  12. Lifehack: Adopt bears in pairs. Raise them as your children.
  13. This "Gandhi" movie is a total ripoff of my life story.