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dogsdoingthings

  1. Dogs securitizing your debt to society. about 4 hours ago via txt
  2. Dogs lying in a strained, broken heap as the murmuring voice of a Life Alert operator pauses briefly and notes, "We can pickle that." about 9 hours ago via web
  3. Dogs detonating a dictionary and musing to the scattered, billowing pages, "Life is merely verbiage." about 10 hours ago via web
  4. Dogs watching in awe as the assembled shareholders of Berkshire Hathaway collapse into a vibrating pile of orgiastic bliss. about 13 hours ago via web
  5. Dogs recalling absently as the Earth quakes and blows apart into space, "We had joy, we had fun, we had seasons in the sun." 1:57 PM May 30th via web
  6. Dogs striking a pose with a twisted, blood-drenched rictus grin, arguing, "Ceci n'est pas un Psycho Killer." 11:31 AM May 30th via web
  7. Dogs exclaiming, "By George, she's got it!" and immediately drinking the contents of a test tube. 10:53 AM May 30th via web
  8. Dogs stamping out the first cellular organism and muttering to the foreclosed possibility of all biology, "It wasn't much, but it was ours." 10:52 AM May 30th via web
  9. Dogs observing briefly as a comet obliterates the Earth, "Father to a murdered son, husband to a murdered wife—" 9:32 AM May 30th via web
  10. Dogs detonating a dictionary and musing to the scattered, billowing pages, "Laughter is shattered articulation." 7:53 PM May 29th via web
  11. Dogs lamenting as electrical activity in the cerebral cortex gives rise to the illusion of memory, "It was the worst of times." 11:43 AM May 29th via web
  12. Dogs speaking on the lower frequencies as you. 10:48 AM May 29th via web
  13. Dogs flexing manically as a meteor bears down on the Earth, bellowing, "NO PAIN, NO GAIN." 9:11 AM May 29th via web
  14. Dogs encasing the Earth in a hermetic glass dome, explaining, "In a vacuum there is no pain." 7:39 AM May 29th via web
  15. Dogs swallowing a grenade and considering for a brief moment the terrible truth proposed by the Carrie Bradshaw voice-over: "Are we sluts?" 11:01 AM May 28th via web
  16. Dogs swallowing a grenade and briefly joining the self-contained set of all things that do not contain themselves. 9:41 PM May 27th via txt
  17. Dogs staring vacantly into a throbbing stroboscopic void as the Carrie Bradshaw voice-over ponders, "Are we sluts?" 3:08 PM May 27th via web
  18. Dogs listening vacantly to a ticking time bomb and holding it out at the last second, wires coiled everywhere, explaining, "It's for you." 1:52 PM May 27th via txt
  19. Dogs presenting a record of your failed adult relationships to the Senate Committee on Indian Affairs, noting, "It's time for some answers." 8:57 AM May 27th via web
  20. Dogs intoning ominously, "IN SPACE—" and gesturing toward a smashed satellite circling the Earth in an irregular orbit, "—SO CALL ME MAYBE?" 3:41 PM May 26th via web