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devious_monkey

  1. @MexHeadroom That was unhelpful, lemme try again... Use a profile pic of you in a fedora and a "You must be this tall to ride" t-shirt.10:35 PM Jul 16th from web in reply to MexHeadroom
  2. @MexHeadroom Do you think that part of your problem is buying into a definition of insanity quipped by Einstein while he was probably drunk?10:33 PM Jul 16th from web in reply to MexHeadroom
  3. FYI: 50 page reports on eye-movement tech to design better cockpit readouts are NO FUCKING FUN TO PROOFREAD!5:26 PM Jul 16th from web
  4. 3 hours worth of work done today. Might be able to eek out another 2 hours in the morning, but right now, I don't want to read another word.5:17 PM Jul 16th from web
  5. Hello @HannahHatesBoys @pdEIKD . I hope you bots are having a nice time. I've given up on blocking all of you.12:41 PM Jul 14th from web
  6. Ok, people. It's been like 3 weeks. Why the fuck is Michael Jackson still on Twitter's Trending Topics? (Yeah, I know I just contributed.)12:32 PM Jul 14th from web
  7. I mean... It's not like I want to go "hiking the Appalachian trail." I just want to get to sleep before 4 in the morning.12:20 PM Jul 14th from web
  8. I don't think I want anything to do with a "large pillow" or the police.12:15 PM Jul 14th from web
  9. The girlfriend is staying at her parents' and I'm having trouble sleeping alone. Isn't there some service I can order to help with is issue?9:23 AM Jul 14th from web
  10. @deekgeek Us Lefties ROCK! You should work on becoming cool like us.1:14 PM Jun 25th from web in reply to deekgeek
  11. My stubble is acting like velcro with the girlfriend's hair. Which would be less creepy if she wasn't 30 feet away.8:44 PM Jun 17th from web
  12. I'm not in the best mood today. I blame my cat jumping on my head at 5 in the morning for that.8:15 AM Jun 17th from web
  13. @monkeytorturer but without douche bags from high school wanting to compare lives to see who won.8:26 PM Jun 16th from web in reply to monkeytorturer
  14. Drove through the Doom Storm last night to take my drunk girlfriend home.6:44 AM Jun 12th from web
  15. I dreamed that I set the internet on fire.5:48 AM Jun 9th from web
  16. Creeps me the fuck out.9:46 AM Jun 8th from web
  17. You know what I hate? Sex Midgets. You're sitting there watching Cathouse on HBO and all of the sudden you see someone fucking a midget.9:46 AM Jun 8th from web
  18. Well, now my sugar-mama doesn't have a job either. Fuck this economy, I don't want to start selling blood to pay rent.9:44 PM Jun 7th from web
  19. @balseraf I'll be over at Jeff and Irma's a little after 5:30.2:49 PM Jun 1st from web in reply to balseraf
  20. @balseraf Gonna be able to make it to the game tonight?1:03 PM Jun 1st from web in reply to balseraf