dblackattack
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What to do if Jared Fogle the Subway guy is choking...
3:02 PM Feb 8th
via Twitter for iPhone
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It's scary when Ghost Rider transforms back into Nicholas Cage
12:19 PM Jan 24th
via Twitter for iPhone
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I love when the Giants win because I pretend the fratty dudes screaming "G-MEN" in the streets are untimely prop 8 protestors.
8:31 PM Jan 22nd
via Twitter for iPhone
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I don't need gingerbread lotion or a Xmas card with a picture of your child on it...Unless your daughter is hot, in that case I'll take both
6:04 PM Dec 28th, 2011
via Twitter for iPhone
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I eat my feelings. When I feel hungry, I eat.
11:31 AM Dec 12th, 2011
via web
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Houston we have a problem... Apolo Ohno is back
8:35 AM Nov 16th, 2011
via web
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Have any dead bodies been discovered by cops due to the deceased twitter followers reporting that they havent tweeted in a while?
8:23 AM Nov 11th, 2011
via web
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THIS JUST IN: Cher, Chaz Bono's mother, was charged with Involuntary ManDaughter.
10:34 AM Nov 1st, 2011
via web
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Fambly is doing the Brand New Day show again! Monday, 11/7 at 7pm at UCB. There's actually a chance we're gonna get Sting for it.
9:53 AM Oct 31st, 2011
via Mobile Web
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Help us bring sting to UCB NY Nov 7th 7 PM to see Famblys show celebrating Stings 1999 hit Brand New Day
7:16 AM Nov 1st, 2011
via web
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Im becoming an uncle this week, cant wait to try my first placenta soup!!!!
2:18 PM Oct 24th, 2011
via web
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My girlfriends vagina isn't Kosher for passover... shes got a yeast infection.
12:39 PM Oct 19th, 2011
via web
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Hey Oasis, what the fuck is a Wonderwall?
2:14 PM Oct 14th, 2011
via web
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I'm not unreliable... I'm unreli-ABLE
11:43 AM Oct 7th, 2011
via web
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Jews dont get nose jobs, they get face circumcisions
1:05 PM Oct 6th, 2011
via web
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Game of Thrones is about kings playing musical chairs
2:13 PM Sep 28th, 2011
via Echofon
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Its wrong to leave a dog in a car with the windows up, they blast the best radio stations dude
2:46 PM Sep 27th, 2011
via web
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Joseph Gordon-Levitt Equation: 50/50(500) Days of Summer = 10 Things I Hate About You
11:41 AM Sep 26th, 2011
via web
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I eat human eggs for breakfast, I cook them Ovar-easy
5:37 AM Sep 24th, 2011
via Echofon
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I lost a toe nail today...there were 5,677 in the jar yesterday and now there are only 5,676... ugh, roommates!
12:34 PM Sep 10th, 2011
via web
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- Name Dan Black
- Location New York City
- Bio Long Island Douche Bag:
improviser, stand up, writer, & all around rockin dude.
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