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danbialek

  1. It'd save us all a lot of time & energy if every girl on Facebook would just make a photo album labeled "Pictures Where My Tits Look Good."
  2. Yes, all 19 year-old girls, just keep getting tattoos EVERYWHERE (hands, neck, tits, etc.). There's no way you'll ever regret any of them.
  3. Summer 2012: The year all summer movie trailers were cut to dubstep.
  4. Most people are only 3 to 4 cocktails away from being total human garbage at any given time. True fact.
  5. Great job. You human fucking 9/11.
  6. Hey, 50-yr-old dude in the Hawaiian shirt buttfucking your date on the dancefloor at this wedding my wife dragged me to...
  7. The dude from Sublime has been dead for over a decade, but all of the members of 311 are still alive. How in the fuck is that possible/fair?
  8. I'm at the @EdGalvez @PunkHouse show tonight at 9pm. Here are the details: facebook.com/events/4083176… Fuck yeah!
  9. New AFT Jungle Video – Spring Break Forever! ow.ly/aSYeW
  10. New AFT XBox Chavez Comm Tech Video – Skyrim Brutal Giant Beatdown ow.ly/aRipS
  11. If you're over 30 and currently wearing skinny jeans I hope you lose both of your legs in an escalator accident involving hammerhead sharks.
  12. @kn21043 You are the kindest person alive. Thank you very much. I appreciate it.
  13. I would not have worn this "Powered By Blowjobs" t-shirt if I'd remembered today was parent-teacher conference day. It's not even ironed.
  14. Just heard a waitress tell the table next to me that she screwed up their order because she "had a rough trapeze class yesterday." #ihateLA
  15. Holy crap, Orange County, California does not want to let the 90's go. Fred Durst should move here. He'd be nominated king for sure.