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cohills

  1. There's a guy getting his back waxed in the curtained-off "room" next to mine. I hope Seth Rogan & Paul Rudd are in there too. If not...eeww about 18 hours ago from TwitterBerry
  2. Because gay–hating Family Ties fans have lots of disposable income...? about 22 hours ago from WitStream
  3. Meredith Baxter is out–trending Afghanistan! And, once I again I repeat: Twitter is valued at $1 billion. about 22 hours ago from WitStream
  4. Finally got back into running. Best part: hocking some unparalleled lugeys. So satisfying. Good to see you again old friend. about 22 hours ago from TwitterBerry
  5. Gotta admire Tiger's crisis managers for believing that first "explanation" was gonna work. I bet even his grandmama didn't buy it. about 23 hours ago from WitStream
  6. As chatty/needy neighbor approaches bldg @ same time as me, I fumble for keys w/ desperate frenzy, as tho being stalked by an axe murderer. 6:10 AM Dec 2nd from TwitterBerry
  7. Nmohnmmnohmglub. This birthday cake is really good.. (watching The Biggest Loser) Glubgrgllnom...Jeez that guy's really huge...(burp) 6:28 PM Dec 1st from TwitterBerry
  8. The kind of jewelery advertised on TV is some of the ugliest dreck I've ever seen. DRECK. 6:24 PM Dec 1st from TwitterBerry
  9. Hey men: if we can get over your jizzing, you can get over buying us a box of tampax every once in a while. 5:54 PM Dec 1st from WitStream
  10. Are Biz Stone and Biz Markie related, or just really good friends? 6:39 AM Dec 1st from WitStream
  11. to whoever gives me a new car someday in my imagination: a single bow is just lazy. please wrap the whole thing so i know you really care. 9:03 PM Nov 30th from WitStream
  12. Really, what's better than the media reporting on a "media frenzy"? 8:42 PM Nov 30th from WitStream
  13. Dear "ThisIsWhyYou'reFat:" Egg Nog Latte. 12:20 PM Nov 30th from TwitterBerry
  14. Also she's marrying a Jew. Hmm let's see...something about Lewinsky maybe? Or "i hope her ham is kosher"? OK i'll keep brainstorming. 6:56 AM Nov 30th from WitStream
  15. Chelsea Clinton engaged. May I be the first to say something about a cigar and an intern and/or a blue dress? Thanks, I'l be here all night. 6:54 AM Nov 30th from WitStream
  16. Next week I'll be writing a short, Sarah Palin-inspired memoir spanning 4-5 days entitled "Going on the Rag." Exclusively at Duane Reade! 9:01 AM Nov 27th from TwitterBerry
  17. What am I supposed to do with all the snot that's accumulated in the crook of my arm? 7:00 AM Nov 27th from WitStream
  18. I'm attending The Blend: Featuring Witstream -- http://theblenddec10th.eventbrite.com/?ref=estw 5:22 PM Nov 26th from web
  19. Apey coooool! I'll email you with account info, prob tomorrow AM. Thanks, glad to have you! 6:30 PM Nov 25th from txt
  20. @Apey @wittels @robdelaney Delaney will you tell your friends all about moi? 2:32 PM Nov 25th from web in reply to Apey