chucknorris_
@chucknorris_ eats steak for every single meal. Most times he forgets to kill the cow.
| It takes Chuck Norris 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes. |
|
| Chuck Norris has 12 moons. One of those moons is the Earth. |
|
| Chuck Norris can make a paraplegic run for his life. |
|
| Death once had a near-Chuck-Norris experience. |
|
| Chuck Norris once visited the Virgin Islands. They are now The Islands. |
|
| If Chuck Norris is late, time should better slow down. |
|
| When Chuck Norris had surgery, the anesthesia was applied to the doctors. |
|
| China was once bordering the United States, until Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked it all the way through the Earth. |
|
| The Bible was originally titled "Chuck Norris and Friends" |
|
| Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill. |
|
| Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you. |
|
| Retweeting @theuer: @chucknorris_ did you know that? type "find chuck norris" at google and do a "i'm feeling lucky" search ;). |
|
| Chuck Norris Invented the QWERTY. All the other letters got kicked. |
|
| When you say "no one's perfect", Chuck Norris takes this as a personal insult. |
|
| If you spell Chuck Norris in Scrabble, you win. Forever. |
|
| Chuck Norris is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis. |
|
| Chuck Norris computer's actually runs Windows 2018. |
|
| Chuck Norris’ house has no doors, only walls that he walks through. |
|
| Chuck Norris doesn't sleep, he waits |
|