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Canada
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United Kingdom
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Indonesia
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Ireland
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India
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Jordan
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United States
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ChrisPutro

  1. At Chick-fil-A someone recognized me from The Crispy Comedy Show. I am FAMOUS. 3:13 PM May 8th via txt
  2. There's a tube of anti-itch cream in the men's room at work. No one dares touch it. 11:32 AM May 3rd via txt
  3. I love driving on Sunset and yelling "chrisputro.com" as I pass the Comedy Store. 8:34 PM Apr 28th via txt
  4. I'm trying to get that One Direction song out of my head by using its own lyrics against it. No luck yet. 12:01 PM Apr 28th via txt
  5. With 2 outs in the 9th, someone in my section just farted! 3:24 PM Apr 22nd via txt
  6. I just saw a guy crossing my street with an Ed Grimley hair spike. Fashion is totally cyclical I must say! 11:36 PM Apr 19th via txt
  7. An English guy just greeted me with "Evening, Governor." They really say that! 9:57 PM Apr 19th via txt
  8. It would be doubly awesome if Dick Clark died at the stroke of midnight. 1:13 PM Apr 18th via txt
  9. Beauty Bar is playing Love Shack. See, it IS a cool song. 7:51 PM Apr 5th via txt
  10. New sandwich artist at Subway is named Pandora. I'd love to open HER box! 2:10 PM Apr 4th via txt
  11. There's a hottie at Beauty Bar dressed exactly like Boy George. She makes me want to have sex with Boy George. 10:14 PM Mar 29th via txt
  12. The South Philly Experience truck is once again out of Herr's. What's the point then? 12:20 PM Mar 21st via txt
  13. I just saw a bunch of squashed candy corn on the ground at Sunset & Orange. In March. WHY DOES CANDY CORN EXIST? 1:37 PM Mar 13th via txt
  14. I'm at a bar. A girl bumped my chair. I turned around and tried to talk to her. She made eye contact and then RAN AWAY. 1:36 AM Mar 11th via txt
  15. I walked a fellow comedian (who left without performing) AND a Seinfeld actor at the same time. Highlight of my comedy career. 9:51 PM Mar 8th via txt
  16. This Time Warner customer service rep Blair better add me on Facebook like she promised. 1:08 AM Feb 29th via txt
  17. Whitney Houston changed the Star Spangled Banner from 3/4 time to 4/4. Good riddance! 6:33 PM Feb 11th via txt
  18. I forgot I had tacks in my back pocket. I'm bleeding out of the wrong part of my ass! 7:14 PM Jan 24th via txt
  19. LLOL at LMFAO..."drunked" up? 2:19 AM Jan 1st via txt
  20. New Year's resolution: start telling 95% of people who want my time to F off. And expand the time I spend on the other 5% 1:11 AM Jan 1st via txt