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chrisocallahan

@bertkreischer @fitbit How do you like the scale? Do you use the fitbit as well? thinking about biting the bullet... about 2 hours ago via TweetDeck in reply to bertkreischer
The drunk girl getting a piggyback from that sailor seems to have forgotten she did not wear panties tonight... about 11 hours ago via TweetDeck
@AnthonyCumia I love being me, but you sir are one of few people I'd love to trade lives with for a day or forever about 14 hours ago via TweetDeck in reply to AnthonyCumia
...And you have to ignore "I can't stand this guy" tweets all night. about 14 hours ago via TweetDeck
My boss who hates being called my boss just got Mr. Me Me Me all fired up. Fuck, now I have to listen to "I don't care" rants all night. about 14 hours ago via TweetDeck
Not doing no or low carb thing. Just skipping em when not essential to enjoyment of the meal. That said, Carbs are fucking delicious. about 16 hours ago via TweetDeck
Begged my friend not to talk out loud about planning a trip to Phoenix to see #Rangers in Finals. Looks like he jinxed both teams. about 18 hours ago via TweetDeck
Mom coming. Bought bagels. My God do they smell good. 4:48 AM May 25th via TweetDeck
Summerland Tour July 18! Holy shit, that whole room will be filled with creepy old guys. 7:30 PM May 24th via TweetDeck
Damn, I am loving the O & A 90s alt rock segment far too much. 7:21 PM May 24th via TweetDeck
Cleaning house. Found my old big box of porn. Remember when naked ladies only came on glossy paper & crusty video tapes? #internetisforporn 4:21 PM May 24th via TweetDeck
Ever see you have a new follower and wonder how pissed they'll be the next time you say "cunt?" 9:32 PM May 23rd via TweetDeck
@walkingmishap Maybe it was the lowered expectations, but it hit the spot. Just like sometimes a quick handy is simply awesome. 9:29 PM May 23rd via TweetDeck in reply to walkingmishap
Got Cookies & Cream protein shake to replace crap dinner because @walkingmishap put Oreo Shake in my head. That'll be just as good, right? 8:29 PM May 23rd via TweetDeck
I was looking forward to tonight's dinner all day. Even had a dream about it. It has failed to meet expectations. #Letdown 7:36 PM May 23rd via TweetDeck
Today has been a very good day for my wallet. That's on top of morning shift OT which may as well be a paid vacation... 6:48 AM May 23rd via TweetDeck
i said "vitamin water zero" three times. he repeated "vitamin water zero" three times. still, i knew he'd fuck up and he did. 4:17 AM May 23rd via TweetDeck
Love the guy that hits the Stop Please button as bus pulls into last stop. As if driver will turn around and go back with everyone on board. 2:44 PM May 22nd via TweetDeck
I think my cats missed me. To show it, they have jumped on my balls from all sorts of heights a few hundred times. 11:53 PM May 20th via TweetDeck
A few of the 14 year old girls asked me to buy them beer, I'm a responsible adult and told them no because no one should drink Coor's Light. 4:39 PM May 20th via TweetDeck

Name Chris O'Callahan
Location 40.758530,-73.978879
Web http://www.thatgu...
Bio @chrisocallahan is a character played by Christopher O'Callahan on Twitter. Taking tweets too seriously is not recommended and is considered a personal problem.