chirpsin
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dating advice for women from days of yore: before picking up the phone, breathe in, pickup, slowly let breath out as you say hello. genius.
8:53 PM Oct 26th
from web
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too so many girls have no aesthetic integrity and change up their personal style for the hint of a rock. so sad.
3:08 PM Jun 5th
from TwitterMail
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a lisp is not the only thing to set off my gay-dar, just a shirt that fits snugly and a big smile is enough.
4:13 PM May 29th
from TwitterMail
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someone told me girls athletics was only created because so many men couldn't have sons but still really wanted a kid to play sports.
8:51 PM May 20th
from TwitterMail
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in pre-agriculture times women often slept with many available men so the babydaddy was uncertain thus getting child support from them all.
10:46 AM May 14th
from TwitterMail
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ladies who want a baby and suspect their husband's fish don't swim: start wearing two rings on your left pinky. I'll find you.
5:29 PM May 4th
from TwitterMail
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lady had such a beautiful wedgie. wanted to take photos but intuition saved me as her man was watching the whole time. black eye averted.
4:16 PM May 1st
from TwitterMail
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after successful flirting with a girl I realize I forgot to check for wedding ring first, again. unconsciously I must want to cuckold men.
3:36 PM Apr 26th
from TwitterMail
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wish it was the old days when a movie star man wore his pants high, because that way I'd look hot with my shirt off. I have shapely ribs.
12:20 PM Apr 23rd
from TwitterMail
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so embarrassing when my nose gets stuffed up whenever I cry... no I'm not sick, I do not sniff coke, and mind yer own bizness.
7:42 PM Apr 20th
from TwitterMail
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women get emotionally attached to guys they have sex with, people associate popcorn with movies... out of habit not due to gender/genetics.
6:45 PM Apr 19th
from TwitterMail
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women who seem like they'd be mean-looking old ladies are a turn-off... we could end up together forever and I want that base covered.
7:05 AM Apr 19th
from TwitterMail
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Santa Ana has a seemingly unlimited variety and supply of brunettes. If I ever move out, that's where I'm going.
4:05 PM Apr 17th
from TwitterMail
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wondering if breast implants are so common because big boobs are fashionable - or since implants are so common big boobs became popular.
8:50 PM Apr 10th
from TwitterMail
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The higher the heels, the higher the maintenance.
7:27 PM Apr 9th
from TwitterMail
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thinking women don't name their daughters after themselves often because adding "Sr." to their own name makes them feel old.
10:26 AM Apr 9th
from TwitterMail
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downside of paying with debit/credit cards: cashiers learn your name and feign friendship with you. Let's not..
11:31 AM Apr 8th
from TwitterMail
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heard male birth control entails injections, implants. I prefer diabetes since it lowers sperm count and lets you eat bad food
8:59 AM Apr 7th
from TwitterMail
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advice: leave with a girl at the 99cents store ONLY if you went there with her.
2:53 PM Apr 6th
from web
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