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chemicaltofu

  1. I woke up to the sloshy remains of a duckie sno-globe pen on my bathroom floor, and I don't even know where it came from...
  2. a new and improved way to asserting your dominance over your roommate- now with more humping!
  3. WIN! I tell you! WIN!
  4. @giana I'm not. you love me more than the moon. you said so a long time ago... still have that text.
  5. @pagemasterjim we are made completely made of win. talking on the phone and twittering.
  6. i think the moon is stupid. it's garbage and I hate it.
  7. I am now wishing I had a monkey dressed in armor wanting to battle me
  8. wondering what the fuck I'm doing here.
  9. deciding the placement of certain tattoos...
  10. @pagemasterjim it's in my wallet.
  11. you make me touch your hands for stupid reasons.
  12. @pagemasterjim it was loose, crushed up on his nightstand.
  13. The fortunecookie fortune found in Phil's ransacked room today: "you will soon get what you always wanted".
  14. @pagemasterjim there's a diffuser at work that smells like juicyfruit. I want to eat it but it is made of glass and oil so I cannot.
  15. I have found I am vastly uncomfortable with things that smell like juicyfruit but are not in fact the delicious chewy delight.
  16. getting ready for another day with steel faced bitches bored with their own copious amounts of money. what harlots.
  17. i always wanted a guinea pig [i think that's how you spell it] named twitterpated, twitter for short I wonder why they call this twitter
  18. every i do is already very technical and important anyway :)
  19. I am checking e-mail, my very spastic friend sa sent me this invite. i have no idea what to do with it.