burwell
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It took me 15 minutes to remember if I'm 23 or 24. I couldn't remember, so I had to do math. Today's gonna be stupid.
4:45 AM May 14th
via Twitter for iPhone
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'This looks like a job for Superman!' Actually Clark, it looks like a story, and you should stick around and write something for once.
10:39 AM Mar 29th
via Birdhouse
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Five bucks says Obama doesn't turn past the first page of his binder
6:40 PM Jan 24th
via Birdhouse
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Stop internet censorship! @
9:24 AM Jan 18th
via Tweet Button
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Also, coincidentally, I'm pretty sure I've smoked some Blue Ivy before. That shit was cray, ain't it Jay?
8:06 AM Jan 8th
via Birdhouse
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This is me contributing to the twitter traffic concerning Blue Ivy Carter, Beyonce, and Jay.
8:02 AM Jan 8th
via Birdhouse
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If time is money, then it might be prudent for me to come back and pay full price for these shoes rather than stand in this 2 hour line.
11:22 AM Dec 26th, 2011
via Birdhouse
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Suspending his campaign - rather than withdrawing - means Cain can still collect Federal matching funds in 2012
10:44 AM Dec 3rd, 2011
via Twitter for iPhone
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My favorite sites could get shut down by 1st censorship system for the internet. Must stop it: 11/16
12:56 PM Nov 16th, 2011
via Tweet Button
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A dog poops. His master gives him a thumbs up. The dog gets the message.
9:34 AM Oct 30th, 2011
via UberSocial for BlackBerry
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I think I might be the only one left on blackberry messenger.
3:41 PM Oct 17th, 2011
via UberSocial
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thank you for everything, steve.
6:03 PM Oct 5th, 2011
via web
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If deep-fried butter ain't a communiss plot, I don't know what is.
2:28 PM Aug 18th, 2011
via Twitter for iPad
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Girl: Omigod what happened to your knee?! Fashion boy: Oh god, I fell dancing! Girl: Omigod it's like you came back from the war.
7:15 AM Aug 8th, 2011
via TweetDeck
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today is going to be a long day. see what i did there?
11:06 AM Jun 21st, 2011
via web
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@ that's a really: good game
2:53 PM May 15th, 2011
via web
in reply to coopsypoopsy
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Whenever I check the national debt, I think about all the times I've overdrafted my checking account, and then I feel like a true American.
5:44 PM May 12th, 2011
via web
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I wish grapes would ferment themselves and cut out the middle man.
8:18 AM Apr 30th, 2011
via UberSocial
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City may not sleep, but I'm ready to. Ooh a chimney! I bet you bragged to your friends about having a working fireplace in NYC. Hi roomie.
8:05 PM Mar 29th, 2011
via HootSuite
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