Profile_bird

Hey there! boozecoma is using Twitter.

Twitter is a free service that lets you keep in touch with people through the exchange of quick, frequent answers to one simple question: What are you doing? Join today to start receiving boozecoma's updates.

Already using Twitter
from your phone? Click here.

boozecoma

  1. When did Toys"R"Us get a sense of humor? http://www.toys.com/9:24 AM Jul 11th from web
  2. Why I am more popular than Greg Kinnear. http://bit.ly/KM0KY7:27 AM Jul 9th from web
  3. Is there a photo of Steve McNair's girlfriend that explains how she scored an new Escalade? Everything on the net screams used Saturn.11:09 AM Jul 6th from web
  4. Train conductor just pinched my bottle of vodka! Bottle was almost gone & backup bottle has just been cracked! Cram it Choo Choo Charlie!7:39 AM Jul 3rd from mobile web
  5. Who's ready for an eye opener? I AM! First of the day is at 9:25.AM.. Fucking tasty!6:27 AM Jul 3rd from mobile web
  6. Don't think your parents have any fight left in them? Try to get them to spend some money...4:51 PM Jul 1st from web
  7. Michael Jackson: Your death has liberated us from hearing the "Charlie's Angels" theme all fucking day.4:05 AM Jun 26th from web
  8. Current location: Mugging people outside the front door of the Apple store. I have 37 new iPhones and I did not have to wait in line.8:07 AM Jun 19th from web
  9. Boss welcomes me to work by stating "The site's live and there are no complaints about what you wrote!" No one is angry? I fucked up.7:12 AM Jun 16th from web
  10. Search for "squirt gun" on Amazon.com and get a bonus surprize for #8. http://bit.ly/yMjga9:24 AM Jun 9th from web
  11. Traveling @ 21 mph on the highway behind a Rush Messenger van. It looks like the slowdown is being caused by some heavy irony.5:31 AM Jun 9th from mobile web
  12. Math Quiz: Current hourly freelance rate($45) + Conference call(60 minutes) = A)1.75 Liter of Stoli B)1.75 Liter of Stoli C)All Of The Above3:09 PM Jun 5th from web
  13. What you get for not tipping...fuckstick. http://bit.ly/zxdkl8:19 AM Jun 3rd from web
  14. If I ask you to shut up, I do not want an answer.1:50 PM May 29th from web
  15. Co Worker: " The women that's flirting w/ you has a wedding ring on!" Me: "Yeah, I noticed it when she grabbed my balls."9:51 PM May 24th from mobile web
  16. The kid finally catches a break and lands a writing job! Yes, the cubicle will have a full bar.2:41 PM May 20th from mobile web
  17. A 6 year girl wearing a KISS "Destroyer" dress? I don't know who's the more dirty fucker, Gene Simmons or this tart's father.10:17 AM May 18th from web
  18. The next time someone says Paula Abdul needs rehab mention that they need to move out of their parent’s basement. http://bit.ly/K0xy11:30 PM May 14th from web
  19. This is an actual conversation with my father: http://bit.ly/sM80610:34 PM May 10th from web
  20. Either this yogurt is bad or I just bought a freshly lit strawberry candle.1:42 PM May 9th from mobile web
197 Following 185 Followers
Amanda Chapel Cracked.com lazycomic reddog322 Mich D dot TLDs Gerald Weber Q-Wreck Productions Juan Cross Kenny Walker Marvin Dionisio DailyComedy.com Ken Pringle little_steven Tricia Adams Andrew Jones Parachutes Fail Teenbeat Takeover Guy Code Magazine HahaTerrorists.com Ron Reid Desiree Gaddis Tom Waker Erik Dana Loeblich Emily McCombs Competitive Awesome Kamranistan Co. Alan Eggleston Chili Challis Cala Bruger Bloody Popcorn Mike McCarthy TheComedyUnderground TheHeartSleeves Comedy In NYC Joan Littleton