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Apparently, my definition of "drunk" is different than most people. She said "I'm getting faded. Got my Smirnoff Ices." WTF do those do?!?about 4 hours agovia Twitter for iPhone
If you are trying to talk to me and my earbuds are in and I am chair dancing, CLEARLY I've heard ZERO of what you have said.about 5 hours agovia Twitter for iPhone
Why, after 5 years, am I just now reading on my coffee mug "do not microwave" and I've been microwaving it every day? Am I gone die?!about 13 hours agovia Twitter for iPhone