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baileygenine

  1. I don't know why people don't like double standards, they've never been a problem for me. Honey don't touch that. about 1 hour ago from web
  2. The best part about bad moods is shut up, leave me alone. about 4 hours ago from Tweetie
  3. We've made so many technological advances, but we still haven't eliminated shampoo bottles that can't balance on their cap. about 5 hours ago from Tweetie
  4. Take your age + 14 + number of siblings - your first address + make up a number and it'll equal yes, you will always step in cat puke. about 23 hours ago from web
  5. After some research I found out your eyes can identify blue pen, so why haven't you finished that to-do list I gave you, Miss Kitty? 10:09 AM Nov 11th from web
  6. @paul_e_wog "No, really, I love your cats." 1:01 PM Nov 10th from web
  7. @paul_e_wog "Oh, and babe, you don't look fat in that at all." 12:33 PM Nov 10th from web
  8. I'm sure with some good marketing (and the right font) we can pass spilling coffee all over yourself off as some from of skin therapy. 11:15 AM Nov 10th from web
  9. After starting your fourth email with "I'm not neurotic or anything," you kind of have to accept your defeat. 10:37 AM Nov 10th from Tweetie
  10. That salad was so disgusting I had to eat an entire carton of ice cream just to get the taste out of my mouth. 6:05 PM Nov 9th from web
  11. I'm about as good at analogies as flautists are at crocheting rugs. 4:52 PM Nov 9th from web
  12. It's amazing what the human mind is capable of when you're procrastinating. 1:26 PM Nov 9th from web
  13. I love that 24 Hour Fitness emails me, I'd have to actually get off the couch to check postal mail. 11:59 AM Nov 9th from web
  14. I remembered the milk and bread, but I completely forgot to do something with my life. 7:27 AM Nov 9th from Tweetie
  15. Sorry, but you wouldn't have slammed your face into the dashboard if you had studied physics, and if you weren't a cat. 5:28 PM Nov 8th from Tweetie
  16. RT @biorhythmist Klaatu barada nikto #threewordsaftersex 4:52 PM Nov 8th from web
  17. Sorry, Marie Claire, but the #1 website I'm going to waste my time on is not Tony's DailyDanza. 11:53 AM Nov 8th from Tweetie
  18. @hotdogsladies A good beginning would be to stop looking in the mirror. 4:19 PM Nov 7th from web
  19. No, you're doing it all wrong. You need equal parts 'passive' and 'aggressive'. And lose the eye contact. 1:03 PM Nov 7th from Tweetie
  20. How, in a passive conversation, would you tell someone that you're missing a toenail? Okay, two, two toenails. 11:42 AM Nov 7th from web