bagelsandkegels
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@ It was definitely worth the drive in my pajamas.
11:33 PM Nov 22nd
from web
in reply to OC_GirL
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Two crucial things missing from my life right now: sour cream and onion Pringles and some chocolate milk. Munchies run, GO!
10:58 PM Nov 22nd
from web
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Dear hot airport cop, I was disappointed that you weren't pulling me over to ask me out. I'm citing you for ruining my day. Ur bail is $700.
10:05 PM Nov 22nd
from web
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@ I hope dog guilt isn't the same as cat guilt. Because usually there's no cat.
1:20 AM Nov 22nd
from web
in reply to vicarpac
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It's irrational, but whenever I see a woman rocking a pair of skinny jeans I feel like she's taunting me because I can't wear them. Slut.
12:00 PM Nov 21st
from web
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About five years ago I passed a pool maintenance van that read "_______'s Pool Service: Making all your wet dreams come true." No joke.
3:31 PM Nov 20th
from web
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I'm either a total pervert or this truck is a mobile double entendre.
1:20 PM Nov 19th
from web
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My comedic debut. I need at least ten people to show up for this. Maria Bamford will be performing. OMFG.
5:56 PM Nov 17th
from web
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No Hong Kong for me. Position already filled. Let's not discuss it any further.
2:20 PM Nov 17th
from web
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@ That information is invaluable. Thank you, kind sir.
10:40 PM Nov 16th
from web
in reply to NYC2VEGAS
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@ I was thinking about how the experience would likely result in some material. It's one of the reasons I really want to do it.
10:35 PM Nov 16th
from web
in reply to vicarpac
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@ Wow. Thanks for the HK review! Definitely going to check out this opportunity since I never get a chance to do any world travel!
10:30 PM Nov 16th
from web
in reply to Valmade
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@ You just answered my language question before I even had to ask. Thanks!
10:26 PM Nov 16th
from web
in reply to NYC2VEGAS
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I may have an opportunity to be a nanny/sitter in Hong Kong for the month of January. Has anyone been to HK and loved the shit out of it?
9:18 PM Nov 16th
from web
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Not sure this roast beef is still edible, but I'm going to take my chances. Living on the edge.
12:27 PM Nov 16th
from web
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TONIGHT: 1st time I've done an open mic without getting a migraine. Also 1st time I've had 3 Coronas before a performance. Interesting...
12:09 AM Nov 16th
from web
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Open mic in WeHo. Migraine meds in tow.
4:56 PM Nov 15th
from web
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Thinking abt doing some freelance writing work helping people improve their online dating profiles. Anyone think ppl would pay for this?
2:52 AM Nov 15th
from web
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I finally get it. Carrie Prejean is just trying to inspire young women to become independent filmmakers.
1:41 AM Nov 14th
from web
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@ I just yellow starred all four of those tweets. I couldn't have put it better myself. Which is why I waited for you to do it.
12:17 AM Nov 14th
from web
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- Name Sam Sachs
- Location Los Angeles, CA
- Web http://bagelsandk...
- Bio You'll laugh. You'll cry. I'll become a part of you.
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