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awomansrules

  1. In the middle ages, they didn't have the technology for opaque fabric or missionary sex. #GameofThrones 11:34 AM Apr 21st, 2011 via Twitter for iPhone
  2. RT @cnni: Italian PM Silvio Berlusconi on trial for abuse of power. In his defense, Berlusconi argued the power really wanted it. 7:07 AM Feb 15th, 2011 via TweetDeck
  3. A woman ought never to expose herself to a ranger. 9:05 AM Nov 10th, 2010 via TweetDeck
  4. @HarderTheyFall Thanks for the RT, Brooklyn! If you have it in your heart, how about throwing me a #ff? I'm lonelier than betty freidan. 3:19 PM Oct 22nd, 2010 via TweetDeck in reply to HyperComboKO
  5. @bestchurchofgod Good Christian Music. If you're listening to anything else, your eardrums are going to hell. http://tinyurl.com/34twa47 8:50 AM Oct 22nd, 2010 via TweetDeck
  6. #capslockday is a terrible idea. what if a word is mistaken for an acronym? 8:46 AM Oct 22nd, 2010 via TweetDeck
  7. Bob Guccione died today. Ladies, you have 24 hours to plan your Caligula themed party. After that, you're back to looking like a pervert. 10:30 PM Oct 20th, 2010 via TweetDeck
  8. RT @awomansrules: Colonel admits to stealing girls panties, wearing them and masturbating. Now we know where all those single socks went. 8:30 AM Oct 19th, 2010 via TweetDeck
  9. msnbc.msn.com/id/39722843/ns… Colonel admits to stealing girls panties, wearing them and masturbating. Now we know where all those single socks went. 8:14 AM Oct 19th, 2010 via Tweet Button
  10. If you think your boyfriend spends too much time watching sports, try folding your arms and shaking your head while smiling at him. 11:41 AM Oct 15th, 2010 via TweetDeck
  11. Thrifty Family Tip! Breakfast Cereals are expensive. You can save money every morning by giving away your children. 4:15 PM Oct 13th, 2010 via TweetDeck
  12. Don't ever watch Thirty Three Miners, One Cup. #ChileanMineRescuePorn 1:38 PM Oct 13th, 2010 via TweetDeck
  13. The #panthers are taking on the #bears. It always saddens me when oppressed minorities feel like they have to fight each other. 11:08 AM Oct 10th, 2010 via TweetDeck
  14. A vagina is a secret one should only reveal to complete strangers. #tellitlikeitis 6:35 PM Oct 8th, 2010 via TweetDeck
  15. Unless your man is an olive farmer, never accept an invitation to the olive garden. Or, especially if he is an olive farmer. 4:39 PM Oct 7th, 2010 via Twitter for iPhone
  16. Dress to Regress! Before that big date, turn around in front of the mirror. The first thing you see when you stop - cover it up, whore. 1:34 PM Oct 4th, 2010 via web
  17. A swimming pool is a great place to work on your tan. To protect against sun damage, make sure you're wearing the highest heels you own. 4:07 PM Oct 3rd, 2010 via Twitter for iPhone
  18. You wear black to minimize your hips and waistline, but have you tried wearing it to cover up that unsightly face? Dress To Regress! 9:41 AM Oct 1st, 2010 via Twitter for iPhone
  19. For optimal hygiene, please remember to discard everything you own after six months. 9:34 AM Oct 1st, 2010 via Twitter for iPhone
  20. On a first date, make sure he thinks you're exciting and mysterious: try murdering the waiter and leaving him a clue. 12:23 PM Sep 30th, 2010 via Twitter for iPhone