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arjunbasu

  1. The hipster wears an old plaid shirt and gets exiled from his bar and he goes home and throws out all his cardigans and listens to U2 again.about 5 hours ago from web
  2. He gives her a glass of wine and buys her a necklace and takes her to the opera and flies her to Paris and she says, That's not love, dear.about 6 hours ago from TwitterBerry
  3. And when he spilled wine on her blouse and she took it off and said "Clean it" he felt a frisson, which was just another word for "hard on."about 7 hours ago from TwitterBerry
  4. He watches the clouds cover the sky and then threaten rain. The picnic is not going to happen, he says. I hate you more than ever, she says.about 11 hours ago from Seesmic
  5. There is no love here, just lots of food on the table and the sounds of aggressive chewing. After this meal I'm going to eat more, Dad says.about 14 hours ago from web
  6. He was a happy man entering middle age when a funk overcame him. I don't have many more years with which to ruin my life, he told his friendabout 17 hours ago from TwitterBerry
  7. He was playing Monopoly with the kids and he smelled her perfume and he stood up and said, Excuse me kids but I have to go screw your motherabout 20 hours ago from web
  8. Jim has a theory that yoga girls have big feet and nice asses because they don't wear shoes and the boys consider this and down another shot4:07 PM Nov 7th from Seesmic
  9. The clouds were violet and he said, These drugs are working, and she said, No, that's natural, and he ran into a wall and said, Now they are11:56 AM Nov 7th from web
  10. He stunk up the house real bad just before his in-laws were coming over, and after they'd left he asked his wife, So, do they still love me?9:37 AM Nov 7th from web
  11. RT @Celticlady1953 Today is National Bookstore Day..Go buy a book and support your local indie bookstore.9:35 AM Nov 7th from Seesmic
  12. He couldn't admit he was late because he was getting a pedicure. So he said he had been with a hooker. And there were high fives all around.8:37 AM Nov 7th from web
  13. Jim discovers hair in his ears and then he buys a sports car. And goes into a massive debt spiral. So he buys a sportier car. Much sportier.7:25 AM Nov 7th from Seesmic
  14. He says, I'm on an expense account. And later, he regrets having said that because the guys that take advantage of him aren't all that cool.2:52 PM Nov 6th from TwitterBerry
  15. Once again, thanks for the #followfriday mentions. I will try not to pee my pants. Oh, darn. I'll be right back.2:40 PM Nov 6th from web
  16. They go to a bar and he tells his friends, Tonight's the night and they say, You always say that and then he says, cue the Lou Rawls. Again.12:59 PM Nov 6th from web
  17. They made eye contact in produce and finally starting talking at the meat counter. I'd so be interested if my kids weren't with me, he said.8:49 AM Nov 6th from TwitterBerry
  18. When the freezer held only boxes of chicken fingers, he realized his job was done and it would be mere seconds before his wife left for good7:53 AM Nov 6th from Seesmic
  19. OR, just take a look at my lists and #followfriday those. I have some good ones. No really. Well, at least I think so. Would I lie to you?7:44 AM Nov 6th from Seesmic
  20. Twitterbelle faves: @rejecter @sarkastickunt @ChiNurse @RexHuppke @ange_black @PunkTaco @FakeAPStylebook @ruthakers http://bit.ly/6tH1H7:40 AM Nov 6th from web