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angrysantaelf

  1. Each iPad cost us $2.99 to make this year, which means either Apple wildly overcharges or we just sent out drawings. 12:59 PM Dec 27th, 2011 via Twitter for BlackBerry®
  2. When returning a gift we elves made for you, make sure to follow the instructions on our site labeled "Go to Hell and Die." 11:50 AM Dec 26th, 2011 via Twitter for BlackBerry®
  3. Dec 26 is when we have our post-Xmas brunch, where Santa looks at the bill and says, "That'll be 40 bucks per elf. I'll chip in a 5% tip." 8:23 AM Dec 26th, 2011 via Twitter for BlackBerry®
  4. Happy Boxing Day! In celebration we hid another gift in your house. It's rapidly thawing meat so find it soon. 7:24 AM Dec 26th, 2011 via Twitter for BlackBerry®
  5. Santa just said, "Here's next year's hot toy! Monster High Juvie!" Then he showed us a Vampira doll with loaded handgun and 3 priors. 7:20 PM Dec 25th, 2011 via web
  6. Spending day cleaning workshop, reviewing deliveries and locating the families of all the kids who hid in Santa's sleigh. 4:58 PM Dec 25th, 2011 via Twitter for BlackBerry®
  7. Whenever Santa accidentally skips a house he plants evidence there so he can say they were naughty. 2:47 PM Dec 25th, 2011 via Twitter for BlackBerry®
  8. Santa's doing post-delivery interviews saying, "I couldn't have done it without those short guys. What do you call them? Oompa Loompas." 2:26 PM Dec 25th, 2011 via Twitter for BlackBerry®
  9. Santa's Post-Delivery Speech to the Elves: tinyurl.com/8a4bf3l 12:27 PM Dec 25th, 2011 via web
  10. Santa arrived home in someone's Smart car, meaning we have no idea where he left the sleigh. 12:21 PM Dec 25th, 2011 via Twitter for BlackBerry®
  11. Santa is still asleep, elves are still drunk and reindeer are still flying as far away as possible. 11:02 AM Dec 25th, 2011 via Twitter for BlackBerry®
  12. I wish you all the very merriest of Christmases! More tomorrow on the aftermath and our demands for Boxing Day off! Enjoy! 11:35 PM Dec 24th, 2011 via web
  13. Well, Santa will be heading home soon to have his customary celebratory crate of brandy. Thank you for following along on our ride! 11:34 PM Dec 24th, 2011 via web
  14. Next is Los Angeles, where Santa will hand out scripts instead of toys, trying to get kids to invest in his horror movie "Claustrophobia." 11:34 PM Dec 24th, 2011 via web
  15. Santa's in San Francisco, taking forever to get down Lombard Street. 11:28 PM Dec 24th, 2011 via web
  16. Santa now in Las Vegas, where gambling is less a problem than Santa having to see every single damn Cirque du Soleil show there. 11:21 PM Dec 24th, 2011 via web
  17. Next stop is Portland, Oregon, where Santa wants to bike through despite the fact that would put us back at least a good three weeks. 11:11 PM Dec 24th, 2011 via web
  18. Entering Seattle with more "Screaming Trees" CDs than anyone there wants for a gift. 10:57 PM Dec 24th, 2011 via web
  19. Now Santa's just leisurely wandering around Vancouver, reliving scenes from "X-Files" episodes. 10:54 PM Dec 24th, 2011 via web
  20. Why is Santa back in Canada yet again?! Did he decide to become a Men Without Hats tour groupie? 10:44 PM Dec 24th, 2011 via web
  • Name FrancescoMarciuliano
  • Location North Pole
  • Bio One of the North Pole 99% (Santa is the 1%)
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