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androo

  1. To sleep. Perchance to wet dream. 5:57 PM Nov 14th from Tweetie
  2. My pee stream is so thick, the Romans built a bridge over it. 4:32 PM Nov 14th from Tweetie
  3. @ccake that's what I'm sayin! 4:01 PM Nov 14th from Tweetie in reply to ccake
  4. Will someone tell my ladyfriend that girls telling me I look like Johnny Depp is NOT an insult? (I also get 'Jesus' - So there you go) 3:50 PM Nov 14th from Tweetie
  5. Bill Hicks was the white Obama. 2:24 PM Nov 14th from Tweetie
  6. I don't know about you, but I HATE when people leave cigarette butts in the toilet. It makes them really soggy and hard to light. 1:30 PM Nov 14th from Tweetie
  7. You can't polish a turd, but apparently you CAN roll it in glitter. 12:32 PM Nov 14th from Tweetie
  8. 'Dick Pimple' would be a great name for a crap band. 7:30 PM Nov 13th from Tweetie
  9. Ed Hardy is like Lisa Frank for adults. 2:21 PM Nov 13th from Tweetie
  10. You shouldn't throw sea urchins if you live in a flesh house. Because ouch. 3:23 PM Nov 12th from Birdhouse
  11. @3hoss Pardon? 3:22 PM Nov 12th from Tweetie in reply to 3hoss
  12. My Dick Jokes are so big it takes a team of Yo Mamma So Fat Jokes to jerk them off. 12:02 PM Nov 12th from Tweetie
  13. First Person Shooters are like flight simulators for your face. 1:31 PM Nov 11th from Tweetie
  14. I thought I'd had the LAST word in that argument... Turns out if was the FIRST word of a new one. 11:03 AM Nov 9th from Tweetie
  15. http://twitpic.com/osorz - leave the light on 12:44 PM Nov 8th from TwitPic
  16. The best thing about spilling a full beer is... an impossible sentence to finish. 11:56 AM Nov 6th from Tweetie
  17. I tweet, therefore I SPAM. 1:45 PM Nov 4th from Tweetie
  18. 18 past orange. http://twitpic.com/o6hkl 3:23 PM Nov 3rd from Tweetie
  19. DAY 1127 Reeeeeeeeeeally starting to regret those desert island album choices right about now. 12:15 PM Nov 3rd from Tweetie
  20. Two goldfish in a tank...one looks at the other and says 'You do the driving, I'll man the gun!' (I turn six next week) 12:04 PM Nov 1st from Tweetie