AmyJane
Jonas, upon entering small mammal house at the zoo: "Jesus Christ, this place smells like pee! Can we leave?" That's how I know he's my boy.
| AmyJane @tj Get your own material, buddy. I have to live with him, so I get all the jokes. |
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| AmyJane @hotdogsladies I blame you: http://perezhilton.com/2008... |
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| AmyJane @JiminyChrist I think I love you. |
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| AmyJane Me: "What do you want to drink with dinner?" Jonas: "A Dale's Pale Ale." John told me @jimray would definitely favorite this tweet. |
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| AmyJane John: "Jalkut made a song out of your tweets". Me: "What the FUCK are you talking about?" |
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| AmyJane @EffingBoring I cannot take any more tweets about bugs. I'm all itchy! Please move. |
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| AmyJane Thanks to Merlin, I'm listening to Archers of Loaf. I wonder if I'll listen to music in 15 years and think, "Wow, I feel fucking 35 again!" |
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| AmyJane He's now back to sleep, cuddling my phone. Exactly like is father is doing upstairs with his own phone. It's warped, but a little sweet. |
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| AmyJane Jonas woke up in tears: "Did you have a bad dream?" Him (hysterical): "Yes! Somebody stole Daddy's iPhone!" Took 30 minutes to calm him. |
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| AmyJane @kerri9494 Guitar Hero Aerosmith version. No idea why I bought it, since I hate Aerosmith. |
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| AmyJane Got a little paranoid about some spam titled "Jiminy" and "Jonas". It's time to step away when you feel the spam is talking directly to you. |
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| AmyJane I think I'm going to learn to play a real guitar. It seems like a better use of my time AND I won't have to play all this fucking Aerosmith. |
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| AmyJane When I'm a little down and need a pick-me-up, I read the Netflix member reviews of The Artistocrats. "THE JOKE ISN'T EVEN FUNNY!!!!!!" |
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| AmyJane @nevenmrgan Screw you, Neven. I clicked on that and getting redirected to DF is just like getting Rickrolled. |
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| AmyJane Jonas just explained Pac-Man to me. I didn't have the heart to tell him my generation had a whole song about the game. |
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| AmyJane "There are a lot of men kissing at this bar." "Well, I'm gay for Bass on tap." |
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| AmyJane How I know I'm getting old: My sister is frantic about getting Batman tickets. I'm thinking, "Jesus, can't you kids just wait a week?" |
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| AmyJane There are a ton of gay bars in Philly and I've been to most of them. But "Uncles"? That place creeps me out. |
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| AmyJane Anatomy lesson with Jonas: "Do you know what's in your heart?" His answer: "Tacos." |
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