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Twitter is a rich source of instantly updated information. It's easy to stay updated on an incredibly wide variety of topics. Join today and follow @amifivethousand.

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Codes for other countries

Two-way (sending and receiving) short codes:
Country Code For customers of
Australia
  • 0198089488 Telstra
Canada
  • 21212 (any)
United Kingdom
  • 86444 Vodafone, Orange, 3, O2
Indonesia
  • 89887 AXIS, 3, Telkomsel
Ireland
  • 51210 O2
India
  • 53000 Bharti Airtel, Videocon
Jordan
  • 90903 Zain
New Zealand
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United States
  • 40404 (any)

amifivethousand

  1. @BlahBethany Text back a really ridiculous price.
  2. Ty Wigginton you...C'MERE BIG GUY.
  3. Well this is not the start I expected. Sigh.
  4. @RedSoxRedShoes I'm about 75% sure this means the world will end tomorrow.
  5. My dad likes my boyfriend. Kyle Kendrick shuts out the Cards....THIS IS BIZARRO DAY.
  6. Cards Against Humanity. Cannot wait to play this game! instagr.am/p/LGsuhKJRSn/
  7. @TheKenChilds Seems like the appropriate reaction.
  8. @TheKenChilds It's pretty fantastic. Of course, I have to thank this blog for inspiring me: adamusprime.tumblr.com/niccagehead
  9. Every time I open Twitter my immediate reaction is GAH thanks to the background. Good times.
  10. @jetzzfan It's safe for work, but pretty close to nightmare fuel.
  11. I'm hoping my new profile background freaks the hell out of everyone.
  12. So wait are my boobs against Chooch or not. I'm starting to get confused.
  13. I'd press my boobs against Chooch in a completely not awkward way.
  14. Thank god we're talking about what Sarge would wear with an old Babe Ruth jersey rather than this shitty game. WAIT sarge doesn't own jeans?
  15. *turns on game* OH WHAT THE FUCK *turns off game*
  16. WB Mason is going to save the United States one ream of paper at a time.
  17. "I'm tellin' you these pitchers are athletes!"--Wheels. uhhh thanks for that insight wheels.
  18. Dugan loves the spray fan. Loves it. instagr.am/p/K25_lLJRbe/