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aliciagoldsmith

Dear Vegas, Thanks for treating me like a hooker even when I'm wearing a knee length dress and cardigan. xoxo, Alicia about 10 hours ago via txt
@SuzyFuckinCydal You're welcome. <3 11:23 PM May 24th via Twitter for Mac in reply to SuzyFuckinCydal
@BenDelatte Come to Vegas. They grow on trees here. 10:21 PM May 24th via Twitter for Mac in reply to BenDelatte
@BenDelatte I saw a pack of Pretzel M&M's today that said "Now with more pretzels!" MORE?! Brain wrinkled. 8:50 PM May 24th via Twitter for Mac in reply to BenDelatte
perlapell I'm gonna open a store called "The Browse". There are no employees and everything is glued down and not for sale but really cool to look at. 3:20 PM May 24th via web Retweeted by aliciagoldsmith and 36 others
RashisTVUgly Overheard someone n a bathroom stall utter "Ouch." It was a very calm, matter of fact "Ouch." No cause 4 alarm. The pain was what it was. 10:44 AM May 23rd via web Retweeted by aliciagoldsmith and 83 others
DinosThirdTwitt Starburns wasn't officially dead until now. That'll get 'em. #danharmon 4:16 AM May 19th via Twitter for iPhone Retweeted by aliciagoldsmith and 245 others
DinosThirdTwitt My daughter warmed my heart today. She informed me that most people are stupid. I didn't know that until I was 20. #advanced 6:34 PM May 20th via Twitter for iPhone Retweeted by aliciagoldsmith and 27 others
TheOnion Every NBC Program To End With Character Straight Up Asking Viewers What Kind Of New TV Shows They Would Like To See onion.com/MAxY9d 9:20 AM May 21st via Onion News Stream Retweeted by aliciagoldsmith and 287 others
@BenDelatte Cross counrty book club? I'll send it to ya so long as you prom to give it back. I lurve it so much I'm down for a reread 10:38 PM May 21st via txt
@BenDelatte Haha I love it! Without you to whisper my snide comments to I end up word voming them. Work randies think I'm a cunt :/ 10:38 PM May 21st via txt
@BenDelatte I just need more of your snark in my life. I come off like a bastard without you. I need my bitch! 6:16 PM May 21st via txt
@BenDelatte Come to Vegas and watch the Oscars with me! I was too drunk/bitter to pay close enough attention the first time anyways :/ 7:55 PM May 20th via Twitter for Mac in reply to BenDelatte
abobrow "Talk talk talk. All you ever do is talk." - TED's wife. 10:23 AM May 20th via Twitter for iPhone Retweeted by aliciagoldsmith and 58 others
@DanHarmon Regarding This Our Darkest Timeline wp.me/p2aO4X-1w via @wordpressdotcom 11:12 PM May 19th via Tweet Button
@BenDelatte Always. Just gimme five minutes and I'll be there to carry that tacky backpack for you. I got no shame. 6:29 PM May 19th via Twitter for Mac in reply to BenDelatte
@BenDelatte A teeny purse fill to the brim with cigs, a lighter, and a flask. Nothin classier. 6:25 PM May 19th via Twitter for Mac in reply to BenDelatte
@BenDelatte Less tacky than concealing the ganked alchy in your blouse pocket. 6:13 PM May 19th via Twitter for Mac in reply to BenDelatte
meganganz Some people think there are a lot of synonyms for the word "irreplaceable." I don't. 9:44 PM May 18th via Twitter for iPhone Retweeted by aliciagoldsmith and 482 others
cpmckenna Nov. '09 I joined my favorite show on TV and today leave my favorite anything ever. Thanks Community, fans, and @DanHarmon. E Pluribus Anus. 9:01 PM May 18th via web Retweeted by aliciagoldsmith and 328 others