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AdelesExBF

  1. Whenever Adele would see a baby, she would always ask me, "Haven't you always wondered what a baby would taste like?" 2:47 PM May 27th via web
  2. For Halloween, Adele dressed up as a KKK member than straight-up forgot to take the costume off for 4 straight months. 12:59 PM May 18th via web
  3. Adele safety-pinned her vagina lips together to protect against what she called "Surprise Babies." 8:05 PM Mar 25th via web
  4. Adele has a large back tattoo of a Gateway Cow shitting on a Mac computer, because she was positive Apple was going no where. 1:46 PM Mar 12th via web
  5. Adele called black people 'too-tans.' 5:06 PM Mar 10th via web
  6. When Adele was too tired to walk to the bathroom in the middle of the night, she'd use the bottom drawer of the fridge. 5:23 AM Mar 9th via Twitter for iPhone
  7. Adele would rub the inside of a potato chip bag on her face to get her T-zone just the right amount of oily. 12:51 PM Mar 6th via web
  8. Adele dressed up as a Nazi soldier for every Halloween and for some reason, Christmas. 7:16 AM Mar 6th via Twitter for iPhone
  9. Adele saved all the lint I found in her belly button while having sex and sculpted it into what she called a Lust Bunny. It was life-size 2:55 PM Mar 4th via Twitter for iPhone
  10. Adele could not figure out how to unwrap a stick of butter. She straight-up could not do it. I did it for her every single time. 8:28 AM Mar 4th via web
  11. Adele repeatedly tried to patent "the act of whistling" because she thought it was a "super lucrative untapped market." 9:25 AM Feb 29th via web
  12. Adele claimed she was a vegetarian but that "eating pork doesn't count." 7:10 AM Feb 29th via Twitter for Android
  13. When I was upset about my mother being in the hospital, Adele asked if she should call the Wah-mbulance. 12:51 PM Feb 28th via web
  14. Adele would never explain why, but she always wore thick elbow pads and knee pads under her clothes. 6:54 PM Feb 27th via web
  15. There wasn't an elevator we rode where Adele wouldn't press all the buttons then also pull the fire alarm. 10:00 AM Feb 27th via Twitter for Android
  16. Adele didn't understand how perfume worked and would drink entire bottles at a time then get angry that no one could smell it. 6:50 PM Feb 26th via web
  17. Adele once bet me 5 dollars she could eat only cat food for one whole month. Sadly, she won the bet. 5:14 PM Feb 26th via Twitter for Android
  18. Adele's computer is completely full of her homemade 'armpit fart' sounds. For Christmas, she made mix CDs of these sounds for my family 10:35 AM Feb 26th via web
  19. Adele would regularly confuse her left and right and then try and convince me that I was wrong when I'd correct her. 8:34 PM Feb 25th via web
  20. Six separate times, Adele accidentally tweezed off her entire left eyebrow. 2:44 PM Feb 25th via web
  • Name Adele's Ex BF
  • Bio You've heard her side, now hear mine. I'm not a bad guy. I did what I had to do. TRUST ME.
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