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adamjleach

  1. I just found out that a Muscle Milk spinoff, MONSTER Milk, exists. Oh. Dear. God. I may never go back to New Jersey.
  2. @stinawilks Idea: The Christmas Carol as action movie. Scrooge must fight & destroy 3 ghosts before a bare knuckle brawl w/ a prize turkey.
  3. Some Christmas gift ideas since I'm supposedly "hard to shop for." Baby panda. Super Bowl ring. T-Rex skull. Ronald Reagan's teeth.
  4. Anyone else concerned about Santa's use of domestic eavesdropping?
  5. Whew, weekend is here. I need it. All that eating and watching football sure took it out of me.
  6. To me, shopping is a horrifying enough prospect even before throwing in words like "doorbuster".
  7. Here come the meat sweats..
  8. My Thanksgiving Dinner Game Plan: Avoid liquids. Maximize gravy input. Push through the pain.
  9. This is the only day of the year where it's socially acceptable for me to drink gravy out of a shot glass.
  10. #ImThankfulFor My Freedom. Our Liberty. Your Courage. Thank you, U.S. Soldiers.
  11. We need something like Windows Update for people. A service that locates and installs missing personality traits.
  12. Spending thanksgiving in one of those holes in AT&T's 3G coverage (Translation: I could be anywhere).
  13. Dear "mantrum": Please do not catch on. You are a truly objectionable frankenword.
  14. In NYC for the third time in a week. Philadelphia is starting to carry the appeal of a Gary Busey film.
  15. @LRCoyle Thanks to your profile pic, every day is Halloween in my Twitter feed.
  16. I wonder what the world record is for consecutive dinners consisting of Fruity Pebbles.
  17. Ninja Assassin is redundant.
  18. HAHA RT @FakeAPStylebook: Vegetarians, environmentalists, and animal rights activists may be collectively referred to as "Communists."
  19. Chewy Chips Ahoy is to me as Chris Isaak's 'Wicked Game' is to women.
  20. Hilarious! RT @badbanana: A Turducken for cannibals. The Gooneyvito: Danny DeVito stuffed inside George Clooney stuffed inside John Goodman.