acimmonk
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Sulk back to room. Flick light off and on dejectedly. Knock at my door. Sister Silence. Signs "Everything OK??" My puppy dog eyes sign no.
7:46 PM Dec 15th
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Ab. Pacino grabs me: Hero of the dream factor zero? Ha! It's off the charts! Who do you think is being unfairly treated, cast out, rejected?
7:05 AM Dec 11th
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Conspiracy table thinks I'm "one of them" now. Evicted. Overhear people gushing about "The Miracle of Pork." Hero of the dream factor? Zero.
3:02 PM Dec 10th
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Grilled! Was it chemtrails? Aliens? CFR? Banking elite? Illuminati? Bird flu vaccine? Mumble: "I think he died by his own consent." Booed.
10:34 AM Dec 8th
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Disavow any involvement with slaying The Great Beast. VIP-table pass revoked. Lama talk dries up. Only welcomed at conspiracy table now.
7:33 AM Dec 7th
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A happy Friar B. leaves me alone with Abbot. "Maybe don't take credit for 'bringin' home the bacon.'" My specialness flashes before my eyes.
6:24 AM Dec 6th
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Now look under your plate, says Pacino. Engraving: "Purpose is everything." That is what everything on top of your plate is meant to hide.
7:07 PM Dec 4th
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Friar Buck pounds his fist on the table. A bowl of stuffing tips over. "Eureka! It's like lesson #8! My mind is preoccupied with leftovers!"
3:31 PM Dec 3rd
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Friar Buck begs, "Tell me my mistake!" Ab. Pacino responds, "The problem, my dear friend, is you jump out of the Friar into the frying pan."
8:39 PM Dec 1st
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Put arm around Friar Buck, sit quietly in dark, unsure what to say. Abbot Pacino appears with lantern, face softly aglow and lit with love.
6:59 AM Nov 29th
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2am-Leftovers calling my name. Sneak down to kitchen for stuffing. Find Friar Buck in dark crying. Has tummy ache, wonders why he overeats.
6:47 AM Nov 28th
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Read: Light and joy and peace abide in me. Hmm. More like turkey, stuffing, mashed potatoes, gravy, yams, cranberry sauce and pumpkin pie.
10:14 AM Nov 27th
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OK, sounds good. I got this. Walk to door, pause. Turn around. But what about the tarantulas? My health issues? And.. Pacino: "But but but."
7:40 AM Nov 24th
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"Then what should I do??" He responds: "Don't try to find Truth, just stop making a big deal about your big deals and Truth will find you."
10:30 AM Nov 23rd
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Tell Abbot story of my life, put special emphasis on most woeful bits. Ask how long we should spend on it? His reply: "About 15 seconds."
7:25 AM Nov 22nd
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Cease Mr. Roboto moves atop VIP table. Chagrined. Abbot motions me to office for first weekly counseling session. Messiah complex revisited.
7:27 AM Nov 21st
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Receiving line forms. Regale them with animated recounting of tale. Abbot Pacino strolls by. Bemused. "VIP table? Hmmm. Very Insane Person?"
6:55 AM Nov 20th
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Enter refectory to thunderous ovation. Blush, but fold arms to make biceps look as big as possible. Carried to VIP table amidst Lama chants.
6:47 AM Nov 19th
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A drooling Friar Buck falls to knees in exalted prayer repeating lesson 77! Renewed confusion as to what EXACTLY constitutes a miracle.
6:41 AM Nov 16th
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Kitchen staff awake, find year supply of bacon on doorstep. Word spreads quickly. Riots cease. The blue dot is returned to the blue circle.
6:22 AM Nov 16th
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